


Heart and Soul

by BethBoca



Series: Ryan Haywood [1]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Adorable, Cute, F/M, Fluff, ryan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2017-07-04
Packaged: 2018-09-01 03:15:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 44,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8605111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BethBoca/pseuds/BethBoca
Summary: Everything there is to draw, you draw it. Not that it's always good. Let's just say you have a better imagination than an artistic talent. Moving to Austin, Texas was a big jump, really. You expected to just come over, get a job and buy a house. No. You struggled with your job as a bartender and your skill to become and artist digitally wasn't paying the bills. Apartments sure aren't cheap either. One day, a job offer catches your eye; Rooster teeth. What happens when there is more to the job than you applied for?





	1. Chapter 1

My steps from the bar falter. The men always gave me drunken glances and I shook my head at them each time. I should have expected these looks since my occupation is a bartender. Usually they hit on me, trying to get free drinks and get laid, or they sit there and watch me as if they are ready to stalk me. I shivered at the thought and opened the freezer door. Booze stacked on boxes of more booze sat there in front of me. Caroline was watching the front for me, but there were too many people out tonight to watch fully. Anything could be stolen easily. I heaved the whiskey and vodka bottles up and closed the door with my foot.

"You need help?" I hear Caroline call out from the bar. I shake my head and push the stock from my chest and stomach to the bar.

"I'm a big girl." I joke, earning a smirk from her. I open the back and slip in behind the bar. A few people have cleared from the front but not many. They were mainly the people ordering for other people. I begin to stack the bottles correctly on their shelves while Caroline was busy helping guests.

"Hey there, cutie." I spin on my heels, my hair flowing over my shoulders from the action. I am met from across the bar by a man with short brown hair. His cheeks were flustered by the alcohol and his fingertips were reddened. I arched an eyebrow at him.

"Yes?" I ask softly, trying to be polite. His shoots his finger over at a wall with my drawings hanging up of people who paid me to draw them. One was of Caroline.

"Who uh..." He trails, trying to think. "Who drew those?" "I did." I state.

"Who's asking?" I was in Austin to become a digital artist, yeah, but I wasn't gonna have some drunk tell me they were good. Everything looked good to him.

"I'm Trevor. I have a bossy man who's looking for a um... person. A person who draws." My ears perk up at that. Then they fall when I realize if he was to talk to him, he'd be drunk and the boss wouldn't listen.

"Well sober up, come back, and we'll talk, yeah?" I say before turning back to the booze. He mutters something not quite understandable and so I ignore it. I got my hopes up for nothing. I should have guessed it. Been a year and a half and I've put photos in everywhere but no one wants to hire me. I sighed and looked at the clock. Just as I did the back door opened to reveal Alex. I glance at Caroline and smile, removing my apron. "Bye, Care." I shout over the laughing men and women. She spins and gives a small wave when Alex takes my apron and goes to my position behind the counter. My apartment has always been cold. Unwelcoming. Depressing. Many other things. I haven't exactly gotten to change anything because of management. I don't mind I suppose. My bag is thrown onto the table with my keys and I take a deep breath. I go to the restroom and remove my make up harshly with water and remover before tying my hair up in a loose bun. I look back up in the mirror. Sure there was make up still smearing under my eyes but I ignored it with a groan. God I hated Tuesdays. Always got busy at the bar. I glance at the clock on the nightstand. It was twelve forty-seven... I had an interview at a place called Rooster Teeth at eight... well shit. Maybe if Alex showed up on time I wouldn't be tired as fuck. I'm sure the interview will go as well as the last twenty I've had in Austin and even outside Austin I've gotten so desperate. I pull myself from the hallway and trail to my bedroom, flicking off all the lights on the way. I snuggle into the bed and pull the blankets to my nose. They helped me sleep. The rickety air conditioner kicked on in the window and I sighed deeply using it as a lullaby.

-

_Beep. Beep. Beep_.

I slip my phone off my table and slide the screen over to the red x. I mutter some profanities but I manage to sit up while rubbing my eyes. My feet touch the rough carpet only to shuffle to the closet, me pulling off my pjs on the way. My hands reach in and pull out my chosen outfit for the interview. It was a simple blouse with coverage that was a long sleeve, a blazer and a pencil skirt. I pulled each item on and went to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and hair before applying some lipstick to compliment my facial features and some simple winged eyeliner with mascara. Once everything looked complete I walked towards the table I left my purse and keys at. It was already a most seven thirty and I had to be there by eight. It was about twenty minutes away. Better early than late... I pulled my keys from the table and slung my bag on my shoulder. I put my portfolio from the front potting table into my underarm before locking the door and going to the car. The whole drive was having me annoyed. I have gone to twenty or so interviews and all of them got me no where but a bar. The bar only took me because I practically begged. Caroline had a soft heart I guess. It's been a year with her and Alex and sometimes Paul but it was great. As I waited for lights to turn and cars to move I thought about my approach. Each interview I went to I was trying so hard to get a job from. I was fed up. I'd lie, saying I'm a people person or that my life goals are to become higher up in the chain, but really, I was just trying to look good. This job... I'm gonna be honest. I nodded my head at my own thought. I am going to nail this interview. I am going to get a job at this Rooster Teeth company and I am going to be happy. I pulled up to the building I was given the address to. It was quite large and it looked like maybe it had other buildings it owned around it. I went to the bigger one and stopped at the front desk. There was a short haired blonde woman sitting at the front desk.

"May I help you?" She asks sweetly. She wasn't like most other receptionists.

"I have an interview at eight." I state clearly. She glances over her shoulder at the clock. It was seven fifty-five. She nodded her head and pointed down the hallway with many doors on each side.

"You're gonna go up the stairs to the left and then to the right hallway go all the way down and it's the second to last door on the left." The directions were long but I soaked them in and did as told. Stairs on the left. Got it. Hallway to the right. Okay. All the way to the second to last door on the right. I knocked lightly on the door and heard a throat clear.

"Come in." A man's voice called out. I turned the knob and walked in before shutting the wooden frame behind me.

"I'm here for the eight o'clock interview." I inform him. He was a man with a neatly kept beard and glasses. His hair was short and curly and he had a smile on his lips the whole time but he never showed his teeth. He nods his head and gestures to the seat ahead of him. I take it gratefully.

"So Ms..." He trails.

"Lloyd." I correct. "But I'm okay with Sam." I admit with a small smile. He nods his head and out stretches a hand.

"Burnie Burns." I shake his hand firmly and continue to listen to the questions. "So did you bring in as portfolio today?" I pick up the thick binder in my lap and plop it onto his desk.

"Sure did." He reaches and flips open the thin plastic cover. "Those are just my finished golds. The silvers are in the back." He peers up at me.

"Gold and silver?"

"Yes sir. Won those in art competitions." He huff and continues to look through my pieces.

"Do you have any particular you would like to show me?" I shrug and scoot forward to the book.

"I have many with people but honestly, none really the style you prefer." Burnie looks to me. "Don't think now that I won't do you any good, because my style is free. I do whatever I want. For example..." I flip to one of my silver winners in the back. It was of a cartoon woman looking into the mirror to see her real self with children in the background playing in her house with toys scattered on the floor and the microwave beeping. The TV was on but I drew in static to indicate it was on for no reason. "This piece shows both my cartoonist side and realistic side. The judges believed it wasn't interpreted enough to win gold." I was a little upset about that but I've learned to cope. Burnie examines the image carefully and I can see him smile lightly. Teeth are shown.

"Well it sure is clear that your style can vary. That would be a good thing here at Rooster Teeth. We would need different styles for merchandise ideas and new animations." I bite back my smile to not get ahead of myself. He leans back in his chair and eyes me carefully. "Tell me, Sam Lloyd, what makes you think we should hire you?" There it is. The question I always miss. The one I screw up on. I sigh and lean forwards.

"Mr. Burns, I'm going to be honest with you." I admit. "I have no idea what to tell you to make you think 'wow she should be hired'. I'm a variable that can be controlled. You take a chance and if it's good it's good and if it's bad it's bad. You can fire me and I'll be on my way with no problem. Other than that, it's all up to you." When I finish speaking, he's quiet. He smirks and nods his head.

"Okay. Tell you what. I'll think about it for three days. On the third day I will call you personally with my answer. Why? Because you were honest with me. So be ready for that call in three days." I nod my head and stand from my seat.

"Thank you Mr. Burns." He nods and I can see him cringe slightly.

"Please, Burnie is okay." I smile again.

"Thank you, Burnie." my heels spin and I walk out the office door.

-

It's been two days already and today was the third day. Eight o'clock sharp I got a call. It woke me up but I got a call. I answered it before rubbing my eyes.

"Hello?" I mumble.

"Sam Lloyd, it's Burnie Burns." I sit straight up.

"I have good news- you're hired!" I bite my lip to avoid screaming in glee.

"Really?" I squeak. My voice was suddenly clear.

"Yep! Think you could start today or do you want to-"

"Today is great!" I cut him off with a pounding heart.

"Okay!" Burnie laughs out. "If you can come in- say... twelve?" I nod my head excitedly.

"Okay, I'll make it there." We exchange good-bye and I sigh with pleasure. It was amazing. I got the job. I was honest and he liked it. I had different styles and he liked it. I squealed while thrashing in my covers.


	2. Two

So far what I've learned are the programs we use in the office and what deadlines I'm in charge of meeting. Other than that I was a free person. As long as I did my job right I would be able to roam, talk to others and eat whenever I want. That sounds great and all but a little too slacked for what I'm used to. The bar shift I had tonight started at six. I had work in the morning at eight and I won't get home tonight until two. This is going to be a nightmare. There's a light rapping on the door to my workspace.

"Yes?" I call out. The door opens to reveal a familiar looking man. I gasp when I notice who it is. "Oh my god, Geoff?" I ask with ask squeak. The man nods and comes to me with open arms. I greet him the same and pull back. "I didn't know you work here."

"Well we don't usually talk when I'm sober, Sam." I chuckle and nod. He had a point. Usually Geoff would come in and spill out his frustrations to me if Griffon, whom I've come to conclude was his wife, wasn't available. Being a bartender can make you great friends. "Do you still work at the bar?"

"Duh." I say laughing. "You ain't gonna get rid of me there or here." He laughs a bit and points at me a little.

"Hey, you want to come to the office and meet some of us?" He suggests. "You know, to make friends." I shrug and nod. I follow him out of the office and down the hall a ways to turn down another hall and to a room with a lock on the door and an On Air light not lit up yet. He punches in the code to the office door and pushes it open. He walks ahead of me while I let the door shut behind us.

"Hey fuckers," he says, "this is Sam. She's the new production artist. She also works down at the bar we go to a lot." Now that he mentioned it, two or three of them looked familiar. I pointed to the man with the thick beard and glasses.

"Jack, right?" I ask. He chuckles and nods his head. I smile and wave at him. I turn to the other men I recognized- The British man and red haired man. "Mike?" I ask pointing to the red hair one. He chuckles and shakes his head.

"Close." He states. "Michael." I look at the British one.

"Devin?" The man laughs while shaking his head.

"It's Gavin." I cover my mouth.

"I apologize."

"Wow so formal." I hear a stranger say. I turn my eyes on to a shorter fella that had green hair atop his head but not on the sides. "Ryan will be fond of her." He stands and juts his hand to me. "Jeremy Dooley."

"Sam Lloyd."

"My cats name is Lloyd!" Gavin shouts suddenly. I giggle small and look back at Geoff.

"Who's Ryan?" I whisper. As if on cue, the door opens to show me a taller man with pristine blue eyes and what looked like dirty blonde or light brown hair. Maybe both... His eyes caught mine for a second but then he looked at Geoff.

"Who's this?" He questions. His voice was deep and smooth. He seemed very... down.

"This is Sam."

"I thought the new PA was a boy." I giggle at this and shake my head.

"My real name is Samantha Lloyd Cross. I just use Sam Lloyd." Blue eyes shrugs his shoulders.

"Well I'm James Ryan Haywood but I go by Ryan Haywood." I nod my head at him and shake his limply outstretched hand.

"So where are you from, Sammy?" I whirl my head to the colpurit of the unused nickname. It was Michael.

"I- I'm from New York." I say as the name caught me off guard.

"From New York to Austin?" Jack questions. "Isn't that kind of a downgrade?" I shrug with a small smile.

"I grew up here. To me New York was nothing to home." They nod their heads at my reasoning as a side door to the office opens.

"Hey, Geoff, I was thinking about-" The voice stops and a familiar face runs across my view. It was the drunken man from the bar that night. "Hey! I remember you!" He says excitedly. "What are you doing here?" I shrugged and tilted my head a bit.

"Getting a job. What about you? You work here?" I question. He nods his head and juts out a hand.

"Caleb. You must be Sam then." I nod my head. "Well glad you found your way here. Totally forgot that I offered to talk to Burnie for you." He says whilst rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. I laughed a bit and looked to the clock above the desks on the wall. It was almost time for me to send in my first artwork.

"I better get back. This man... Miles," I say as the name returns to me, "is expecting some RWBY artwork to look over before sending it to sales. I need to do some research..." I trail. I wave the men off and as I look to Ryan, it is evident something was bugging him. I chose not to push it and walked out the door. Maybe when we are friends we can talk about stuff like that together. If we are ever friends that is.

After an hour of research on RWBY and an episode later I finally have an idea for the artwork. I drew RWBY and Sun together back to back and smiling at each other while Sun was in a fighting position and Ruby had her scythe out and ready for battle. I encircled them in a grey ball and wrote the shows name, editing the letters to be more like the title. When I was satisfied with the image as much as I could be I emailed it to Miles. Within minutes I got a reply.

Right on time. Looks great. Sending it to sales and then from there it's on them.

I smiled at the response and stood from my chair with a growling stomach. I didn't bring any lunch... shit. I go to the break room in hopes of finding something to munch on. I was hungry but I wasn't going to make it obvious. When I open the door, a Blonde haired woman with red and pink ends, showing the blonde and these colors are not natural, is sitting at one of the tables chowing down on a sandwich.

"Oh hey." She says before taking a bite. I greet her back and see a vending machine at the other corner of the room. I go to it and dug out some pocket change. My stomach growls loudly and I hope she doesn't hear it. "Didn't bring a lunch?" She asks suddenly. I sigh and nod.

"Yeah. Didn't even think of it." I hear her chair scoot back and I knew she was coming to me to give me something. I quickly stopped her. "No its okay I got it." I tell her. She ignores my assurance and slaps a neatly wrapped sandwich and some cookies on the counter.

"I heard your stomach from here there is no way you're going to starve on your first day." I thank her quietly.

"I'm Sam Lloyd." I say before shaking her hand.

"Lindsay Jones. I'm Michael's wife." She replies. I smile wide.

"That is so cute! A husband and wife working together."

"There's a lot of couples here that started through work. You'd be surprised how easy it is to work with them." She smirks and elbows my rubs slightly. "Who knows, you might get in one, too." I roll my eyes and shake my head.

"Girl I've been doing fine being alone for ten years. Why stop now."

"You haven't gotten laid in ten years?" She asks loudly as the door to the break room opens. I look up and see Geoff coming in with an empty beer can that he throws into the recycling.

"Who hasn't gotten laid in ten years?" He asks with more curiosity of the conversation. I groan and throw my head back.

"I didn't say I hadn't gotten laid in tens years, I said I've been single for ten years."

"But how many times have you gotten laid in those ten years?" Lindsay asks, trying to prove some kind of point. I roll my eyes.

"I don't know, about a hundred?" Their eyes widen and I shrug. "They weren't always a different guy. Is that really a lot?"

"No, Sam, that's not enough." Geoff clarifies. "You should be getting laid a hundred times at least every two years. After that you up the number."

"Why are we talking about my sex life? I just started and we are already talking about it." I complain to try and finish the conversation.

"I know about everyone's sex life." Lindsay says with are smug smile. I smile at her and roll my eyes.

"Thanks for the sandwich and cookies." I say before walking out the door. I find my way back to the office but not before bumping into maybe three people when rounding the corner. I was walking so fast I didn't even pay attention. I passed the Achievement Hunter office but stopped when I saw the On Air light brightly shining in the dim hallway. Out of curiosity I stopped to listen in. I heard yelling. A lot of yelling. But it was only from one person. Was that Michael?

"Gavin, I swear to god I will murder you in your sleep." He yells. I smile and jeep listening to the best I can.

"I'm sorry, Michael, but it's scary." The brit defends.

"It's fucking Slenderman!" I laugh a bit until I nearly scream from a tap on my shoulder. I spin to see Ryan standing there with his hands up. He knew I got startled by his touch.

"Woah, sorry." I blush and look to the sandwich in my hands. "I was just gonna see if you wanted to come in and watch instead of listening." He offered. I looked up to him.

"I can do that?" I whisper.

"You're on your lunch right?" I nod. "Then yeah. It'll be fine. Geoff likes you anyways so you won't get in trouble." I nod my head and he punches in the code to the door for me. I walking behind him and close the door quietly. He shush me softly to make sure I don't make a sound. I can see Michael and Gavin playing Slenderman with Gavin as the mouse and Michael as the keys.

"I fucking hate you." Michael says as Gavin refers to Slenderman looking like an outstretched man in a tux. That's exactly what he is, Gavin. That's the whole thing. I take a seat on the couch beside another man with black hair and glasses. He had a slight beard but nor a full one. Ryan walks over to his computer and sits down, watching the men through the cracks between monitors. I turn it the other man beside me.

"Are they always like this?" I ask with ask smile. The man turns to me and nods.

"Most of the time yeah." He replies. "Gavin is the only one who can piss Michael off so much." I giggle and look back to the workers. They were yelling- well, Michael was- and Gavin was screeching in fear of Slenderman and Michael. The screen began to static and Gavin threw the mouse to the side before jumping from his seat and going out the door. Michael was laughing hysterically while I was trying to keep mine down.

"I'm Gus by the way." The man beside me states. "You must be the new PA Sam, right?" I nod my head at him and he smiles. "Welcome aboard, Sam."

 


	3. Three

My music taste isn't exactly popular. Nor is it great to play in the office. So I have headphones in. Let me give you a piece of advice: Do not wear headphones in both ears at work. Your boss might walk in like mine did and end up screaming at the top of his lungs to get your attention. I ended up getting in trouble for it. This job is laid back but it's also very serious about its content and what is sent out in time. I was currently just sitting in my office, too embarrassed of what happened to leave. I was tired so music was helping me stay up. I ended up getting home just in time to get an hour of sleep for work last night. It's bullshit really but money is money. My phone began to buzz on the side of the desk and I saw Alex's name flashing on my screen. I answered it and cleared my throat while trying to wake myself up.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Sam, I'm so sorry about last night. I should have been there. Caroline told me what time you stayed to. I'm so sorry." He explains quickly. I shake my head.

"Alex don't be an idiot. Your sister was having a baby. It's okay." I assure him. I wish he had gone last night too but his sister needed him. The dad was a runner and she was alone during the whole pregnancy. They lost their parents so it was just them. "How are they by the way?"

"Their good. It was a little girl. She already looks beautiful, Sam. I have a niece." I smile wide. Alex was my best friend ever since I started working at the bar. I was happy for him.

"And Tasha?"

"Nat stuck it out so well. She is so strong throughout this whole thing. I'm happy for her. That baby is gonna love her mom."

"Hopefully her uncle, too." I say with a small laugh.

"Imma spoil the shit out if that kid." He claims. "Hey, so are you at the other job right now?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"When's lunch? I want to thank you for covering me." I look at the clock. It was nearly lunch actually.

"It's in thirty. Where do you want to go?" I ask.

"What about Rusty's?" I chuckle and shake my head. Rusty's was just a nickname we had for the restaurant we always went to. It was so hard to remember the actual name so we chose to nickname it. I nod my head.

"Alright. I'll meet you there in about thirty minutes then." I tell him. We exchange good-bye and I turn to my monitor again. I had to finish this drawing set by lunch and I was only three fourths the ways done with it.

I rushed inside Rusty's, paying the cab before I did. I looked up and saw Alex waiting patiently at one of the booths. I smile and dash towards him.

"I'm so sorry I'm late." I say quickly. "I had to finish this drawing before the deadline and-"

"It's okay." He tells me, laughing slightly. "It's didn't expect you to be on time. I wasn't either. Traffic was a bitch." I smile and nod my head. As I look at Alex, something looks different about him. Like he's nervous. Oh my god did something happen with the baby?

"Are you okay?" I ask after studying him. He clears his throat and nods.

"Yeah. Fine. Why?"

"You seem nervous about something..." I trail. He sighs and rubs the back of his neck.

"I am actually..." I watch him carefully. "I know I brought you here as a thanks for covering me, but I have something I wanted to ask you." I arched an eyebrow. "I wanted to know if you can quit the bar." My eyes widened slightly.

"What? Why?" I asked, slightly offended and also confused.

"Because you deserve better, Sam." He leans forwards on the table of the booth. "That bar doesn't need you. Caroline told me that you could've quit but you didn't. Why?" I shrug and hang my head.

"Because you guys are my friends." I explain. "You guys gave me a job when no one else would."

"And now someone did. So give up the bar and go for the better choice!" He says. I knew he was trying to get me to see Rooster Teeth was better than the bar but it hurt to hear him saying I should quit. We were best friends. Then again, we were exactly that; Best friends. He was trying to help me. I sighed deeply.

"I don't want to leave you guys alone. What if one of you get fucked over and can't come to work?"

"Don't worry about us. Worry about you. Do you really like all the drunk people staring at you or cat calling?" I stay quiet. "Sam, you know-"

"Were you two ready to order?" A young woman asks as she sets down a sprite and a Dr. Pepper. I thank Alex mentally for ordering drinks ahead of time and my favorite. We tell her our orders and then continue our discussion.

"Like I was saying, you know you don't like it and you know God damn well you don't need that bar. We are fine. I promise." He was at a low hum now and I knew he was trying to get his point across. "Caroline wanted you to quit. She knows you wanted something like this." I frown and sigh deeply.

"Fine. I'll quit." I say, giving in. Alex smiles small and pats my hand.

"You'll be happy there and you can always see us whenever you want. You can volunteer but when we tell you to leave god dammit you better leave." He demands. I chuckle and nod.

"Okay."

My phone clicks off to indicate the call was over. I quit. Caroline let me and she was happy I did. Lunch with Alex went well and I was back at the office just in time to run into Geoff and Jeremy in the hallway. I smiled half-hearted at them and I saw confusion on Geoff's face.

"Woah, Sam, you okay?" He questions. I shrug and look at the floor.

"I quit at the bar because they asked me to." I tell them. "I didn't want to but they asked me to instead of firing me so that I could have a better job here." Geoff places a hand on my shoulder and I look to him.

"Hey, we might be dysfunctional and crazy and delusional, but here at Rooster Teeth we are all a family." He tells me. "If someone hurts you its gonna be known throughout the company, trust me. We got you. Newbie or not." I smile and hug him on the side quickly.

"Thanks."

"Plus," Jeremy adds, "you made this company how many drinks?" I chuckle and nod. "You know we owe you." I hug him slightly on the side also before thanking them and walking back to the office. I make it to my hallway but turn the corner and instantly run into someone. That's like the fourth person in two days. I really need to control my pace sometimes. I look up to apologize when I see it was Ryan.

"Oh hey, sorry. I have been doing that lately..." I say quietly.

"It's alright." He chuckles out. "It's do it sometimes. To err is human." He quotes. I smile and nod.

"It's not the mistakes we make but how we correct them that defines us." I tell him. I realize my quote may have been irrelevant so I shut my mouth and can feel my whole face heating up. "Sorry that was stupid." I whisper.

"What? How?" I glance up to him. "I liked it. I can't find words to reply with so I just move out of his way and start back down the hallway. I make it to my office and instantly put my hand over my face.

"You are an idiot, Samantha Lloyd Cross." I mutter. I try to ignore the hot face feeling I had and go to the desk I own. On it was a manila folder. I open it to reveal sketches. What the hell? I wasn't told to check over any sketches... I glance through the pages and find on the last one a piece of lined paper that was ripped to size the note written on it.

Hey Sammy I thought you could use some help to get started. If not, just trash them. I don't need them. - James Ryan

I smiled at his signature, knowing he commented on my name choice. I glance to the sketches and smile. He didn't have to do this... I mean it's an amazing thing to do but he didn't have to. One sketch had Michael attacking Gavin with a diamond sword while dressed as his minecraft skin and Gavin as a creeper. I chuckle at it and could practically see it coming to life. The next one was of Geoff telling everyone they were fired if he didn't win. That sounded like something Geoff would do or already has done. The last one had Jack and Jeremy with snipers and sticky bombs, wearing clothes that didn't look like something they'd wear. Concluding the weapon choices I'm guessing these are their characters in GTA. I frowned when I realized that Ryan wasn't in any of these. I stood from my chair and walked down the hallway with the envelope in my hand. I make my way to the Achievement Hunter office but I see the On Air sign glowing and I couldn't knock or type in the code. I groaned mentally and stood outside, looking over the sketches until I can knock. As I look back over the sketches I smile. Ryan had very thick lines that were hard and focused. He rushed the drawings it seemed which was kind of cute because he probably thinks he can't draw but he tried for me. Either way it was nice. I mean, he was just trying to help me out but it was still so nice. I couldn't explain how it made me feel. So why did he leave himself out? The light flicks over after a round of loud laughter and cheering. I go to the door and knock immediately. It only takes a few seconds before the door opens to show Jack. I smile and wave at him.

"Hey!" I greet. "Is Ryan available?" Jack nods and opens the door wider for me. I go in and walk over to Ryan quickly so that if they are busy then I can get this over with. He glances at me and then at the folder in my hands. "Don't worry, it's nothing bad." I assure him. He smiles small and nods. "I just wanted to know something."

"Well what is it?"

"I want to know why you didn't draw yourself." I say lowly. "I mean, you drew everyone else. I'm sure you could've made yourself, Sweetie." My voice was soft to make sure I didn't sound angry. He shrugs and fiddles with the mouse pad beside his hand.

"I thought maybe you didn't need a picture for that. Just wing it?" He says. I shrug and nod.

"I guess. I mean the sketches are a great help and I am not trying to be greedy and lazy I just wanted to make sure it wasn't a bad reason." I place a hand on his shoulder and smile. "You're seriously amazing, thank you. They are gonna help a lot."

"You're welcome." He replies. "I'm sorry I can't draw that well." I shake my head at him.

"No no I don't care about that. You put an effort into helping me and that was just... I can't explain how amazing it was. Thank you." He nods his head at me and I walk out of the room to my office. Ryan was such a nice guy...

 


	4. Four

I finished off the designs thanks to Ryan and I sent them off to Miles. He sent them to sales who then told me that my first design made it through and already is being printed on shirts. So far the store members have pre-ordered a hundred and something! I was currently in my office, smiling at my accomplishment as I saw the image on the homepage. It was amazing. To see something I drew finally go onto something I didn't pay for. My phone vibrated on the desk and I saw and text from Gavin. I got his number yesterday because I needed him to check over an artwork for X-Ray and Vav. I had no idea who that was so I had to look them up. Turns out they are superheroes. I want to be a hero...

Hey want you to come and meet an old coworker

I swear if this is another matchmaker set up from Lindsay and Kara... They tried to hook me up with Trevor yesterday. I never met the guy so I apparently just had to. I stand from my office chair and walk down the different halls until I get to the office. I try to remember the code to the door. After two tries I finally get it. I just feel so accomplished today. When I walk in the room, I see the men I have become friends with quickly clasping another on his back. All I could see was the brim of glasses and brown hair that trailed on the sides to surround his chin and gullet in stubble.

"Oh good, you came." Geoff states. The guest turns to face me and I gasp, running and jumping on the man in a hug. I could feel tears coming to my eyes.

"Uh..." The man mutters. I pull my face back for him to see and he let's his eyes go wide. "Holy shit!" He immediately returns my hug and I laugh.

"You two know each other?" Jack asks.

"Yeah, yeah we do." Ray pulls back and I smile, wiping my eyes. They watch us for an explanation.

"We were friends in New York. Like baby friends to adult friends." I slap his arm in pain. "All the way up until the bastard quit Game Stop." Ray rubs the spot I smacked and frowned.

"I know, I'm sorry. I thought that you guys were better off without me."

"That boss was a dick!" I complain.

"Wait, you both grew up together and both worked at Game Stop?" Ryan questions. I nod and Ray chuckles.

"I'm pretty sure she beat me at almost every game we played. Some I knew I won because she's a little scaredy cat." He says, elbowing me. I roll my eyes. "Is your gamerscore still higher than mine?" I cover my face.

"Dude shut up!" I say, laughing. It was like he never left. "I'm sure yours has gotten much higher. After you left I got lonely and never played anymore." I admitted. He frowned again. I knew he didn't want to leave but he said he got a job in Texas and was gonna go for it. So he did. Too bad he forgot about me.

"So you're telling us," Geoff starts, "that our Production Artist, Samantha Lloyd Cross, is a better gamer than you, Ray Narvaez Jr., our greatest gamer in gamerscore wise?" Ray nods and I shake my head.

"He's just saying all that. I just get lucky."

"Luck has nothing to do with achievements, An." I smiled at my old nickname. He was the only one to find the shortest nickname my name had that still sounded like a name. I almost liked it better than Sam. He picks up my hair by a few strands and smirks. "I kind of liked the blonde hair." He comments. I roll my eyes and shake my head.

"It burned like a bitch to redo. You always said I was a natural blonde. Thought I'd keep it as a joke. Then I went to red, green, blue, purple... You know, the whole entire rainbow."

"So what's your natural hair color?" Jeremy asks. I smirk and look at Ray.

"I know damn well you remember!" I tell him. He chuckles and shrugs.

"I might." He let's grin slide across his face. "Wendy." He calls out. I laugh at his word and nod.

"I'm a red head. Like full on red. It's a dark auburn to where the brown doesn't show. At least, that's what I'm told."

"Well god damn, we gotta learn more about you." Ryan says, smiling. I shrug and nod.

"I'd like to know more about you guys, too." Geoff picks up his arm to look at his watch.

"Well Michael isn't here yet and if he doesn't show up in five minutes do you want to do a Let's Play sit in?" I learned what a Let's Play was quickly and I knew how they usually went. It sounded so fucking fun really. I nodded my head excitedly.

Michael didn't show up. Ray joined in as a special guest with me. Turns out my gamerscore was still higher than Ray's somehow. It was only by like two achievements but it was still higher. God I had no life... I had bought Grand Theft Auto Five when it came out. When I said I stopped playing I meant non-stop like before Ray left. Now I played occasionally. My character was only a level thirty-eight, but I knew how to play. I didn't get there by fucking around. I got there by doing jobs and killing bitches right.

"Alright, so we're gonna be doing another kind of Free Play thing. Pretty much we never get to just fuck around." Geoff explains. "We are always going in with a plan. Well not this time." I smile and nod my head.

"Did we mention that Ray is back for this one?" Jack asks into the mic. I smirk when Ray does a greeting. I missed him.

"And our Production Artist-"

"An!" Ray shouts over Geoff. I smile wide and cackle at his excitement. It seriously is like he never left. "We were best friends since kids up until I left New York." Ray explains for whoever watches these videos.

"It's a small world after all..." Jack trails in a sing-song voice. I couldn't agree more. I probably would have never seen him again without this job. After about ten minutes, my car, of which I bought for my first ever car, is blown up as soon as I reach it. The little notification pops up above my map.

BM_Vagabond has paid five thousand dollars to replace your personal vehicle.

"Ryan!" I whine. He laughs with the other men and sighs slightly.

"Alright, I'm sorry. Call it in and I'll give you a ride." He offers.

"Ryan is the only guy to blow up your car and give you a ride." Gavin claims. I nod in agreement. I glance at Ryan through the monitors and see him already looking at me. I quickly look back to the screen, face heating up. I do as told and call in my replacement car. I get into Ryan's Torinto and sit patiently as he drives to the end of the way point.

"So, Sam..." Ryan trails. "Tell me about yourself while we are in this silence." He tells me from over the computers. The men laugh along with me.

"Um... My name is Samantha Lloyd Cross... I go by Sam Lloyd though. My favorite color is purple. I am twenty-nine. I have been engaged but never married."

"To Adam?" Ray asks.

"Yep."

"Told you he was a dick." I flinch at the words and nod.

"Yep." My word shook a bit but I collected myself before memories could come back. "Anyways, I love ice cream. I draw at Rooster Teeth Productions. My birthday is August fifth... What else?"

"What about family?"

"I have a brother but my mother passed away and my dad is in New York."

"I miss Greg!" Ray said making me laugh. "He always let me go to your house because you had games I didn't. "

"That's where my games went?" I ask, causing chuckles from the other men. "I thought my brother sold them!"

"Nope I still have them." Ray replies with with a snort. I laugh a bit and look back to the game. We were to the collection site. I got out of the car and into my own.

"Thank you, kind gentleman." I say while driving off. "What about you, Ryan?" I ask, curious.

"What about me?"

"Tell me about yourself."

"He's a killer." Jeremy says, laughing. I snicker at his response.

"What do you want to know?" Ryan asks. That intrigues my interests.

"Anything." He takes a deep breath.

"My name is James Ryan Haywood. You may know me as James Ryan. To everyone else I am Ryan Haywood." I snort a laugh at his words. "My favorite color is I want to say blue but I like a lot of colors. I am thirty-five. I was married but have recently gone through a divorce six months ago." He pauses and I knew that was a hard subject. He moves on nonetheless. "I like ice cream too, but I'm more for yogurt. I work in Achievement Hunter at RT as an editor and entertainer. My birthday is December sixth. I have two kids from said previous marriage." He finishes speaking and I instantly feel closer to Ryan for some reason. Maybe because he didn't need to share that information with me. I don't know...

"Great now you guys are gonna either be shipped or get hate mail." Jack says with a small chuckle. The other men nod and chuckle too, but I don't. Hate mail? I don't want hate mail.

"Hate mail? Why? I'm scared. Please nobody send hate mail." I plea quietly.

"Don't worry, fans just get protective over us." Geoff says nonchalantly. I widen my eyes.

"Like verbal or physical protective?"

"Both." Well shit.

"They already hound you for not knowing who we were beforehand." Gavin inputs.

"Gavin, you idiot, don't tell her that." Ryan says, voice strict.

"I never got any hate mail before... Is it bad?" I ask, nervous.

"Look, Sam," Jeremy starts, "they didn't want me to be Ray's replacement, which I am not by the way-"

"Yeah you are." Ray inputs. Jeremy and him share a laugh before Jeremy continues.

"Anyways, they hated me. Now they love me and my bad jokes. I never get hate mail compared to the comments about me now. They love me just like they'll love you, Kara, Lindsay, Tina, and Barbara."

"Who's Tina?" I ask, not knowing that name from the office.

"My girlfriend." Ray says casually.

"What?" I yell. I stood from my chair and I can see Gavin swoop up his phone to record whatever was going to happen. I go to Ray asked smack his shoulder repeatedly, making him drop his controller and screech for help. "How come you didn't tell me?" I squeak as I stop smacking him.

"Because I started dating her after I left!" He defends.

"You could have told me today!"

"You didn't ask!" I mutter some choice words before smiling.

"I'm glad you got a girl." I say, walking back to my desk. "Finally." I comment. The men send out a chorus of 'ooh's and a small burn from Gavin. Ray chuckles and nods.

"I know, I should have found her a long ass time ago." Ryan has been quiet ever since he talked about himself. When I glanced up, his eyes weren't focused at all but they were staring at the screen. I frowned and went towards his character in the game to see him murdering a lot of pedestrians and cops were surrounding him. I decided to help him out. I equipped heavy armor and turned my armored car to be my shield. I got out and fired a homing missile at the first chopper. It came crashing down and suddenly all the cops faced me. Ryan's eyes flicked to mine and I smiled through the cracks if the monitors. He smiled small back and I can see him firing with more focus now. Glad to see I helped him out if that trance.


	5. Five

So apparently my designs are selling like crazy in the store. It's been almost a week since the pre-orders and I've been told there's been requests for at least two hundred on the newest ones. Those ones had the sketches Ryan threw together. The company decided that they wanted to throw a congratulations party for me tonight. My phone buzzes from the night stand and I go to it, opening the message it received. It was Ryan.

_I'll be there in ten._

Over the week Ryan and I have been close. He would give me little sketches now and then while I helped him through his zoned out stages. I even tried to get him to go on and few dates. He tried out one but it didn't feel right to him. I looked in the mirror and made sure I was ready. My dress was simple. It was a tight Marvel dress that had half sleeves and a bottom that went to mid thigh. I wore black wedges with golden studs to match my necklace and earrings. I was already tall without the heels but I think they look cute... I pull my curled hair to the side and pin it. Once I was satisfied I just waited for Ryan to come. I kept thinking back to what Barbara told me yesterday at lunch. She told me Ryan didn't seem to want to go on dates but he seemed to want to go on the one I asked him to go on. Maybe he was just trying to shut me up by going. Was I a bad friend? There's a honk in the front of the house and I grab my purse, turning off every light and locking the door behind me. I smile at Ryan when I see him dressed in a nice suit and tie. His truck's interior lights shown just the top of his shoulders before the rest were darkened. I climbed into the front seat and buckled up before he pulled out of the driveway.

"You look nice." I comment, eyeing him up and down. He smirks and returns the gesture.

"You look great, too." His eyes stayed on what bare legs shown a little too long he realized before he yanked his gaze from me. I bite at my bottom lip as its quiet throughout the vehicle.

"Am I a bad friend?" I questioned. Ryan furrows his eyebrows in confusion.

"No. Why would you think that?"

"I pretty much forced you into dating again." I point out. Ryan sighs and shakes his head.

"I don't blame you for a shit date." He replies. "I blame myself for not opening up and actually trying like I should have." I stay quiet as he speaks. "I don't know if I want to or not, yah know? I mean, what Laurie did... just up and leaving like that. I don't even get to see my kids, Sam. Do you know how bad that hurts?" I hang my head as a pain in my gut hits hard. I grab my stomach and close my eyes tightly with a grunt. "What's wrong? Cramps?" Ryan asks when he hears me and sees me slightly hunched. I shake my head.

"No, just, uh... Memories." I admit quietly.

"I don't understand."

"The reason I avoid the whole subject with my ex... I was pregnant when we were engaged. Turns out he felt forced into marrying me. Like that would prove he could make a good husband and father. We were engaged for six months before he finally confessed to how he felt. When I got into an argument about it with him I uh... I got an-" I catch my words in my throat and can feel the pain soaring through my gut again, but I know it's a mind trick.

"I'm sorry..." Was all Ryan could say. I don't blame him. What else do you say? Oh that sucks?

"It's in the past now." I tell him. He smiles small and nods as we pull into the parking lot to the bar I worked at a week ago.

"Well then may your future be forever better." I smile and nod, getting out of the truck and towards the bar. I was gonna get hammered tonight.

Aaaand I regret it. Oh god do I regret it. I woke up to myself being in my med, dressed in a night gown and some rolled up socks. I wipe the drool on my chin and sit up slowly. Holy shit how much did I drink? I look to the nightstand and see a small cup of water and some alkezeltser tablets. I furrowed my eyebrows, but I gratefully dunked the tablets into the water, drinking the carbonation with my water. I stood from the bed slowing while walking through the room, taking sips of my water. I rub my head and look around the apartment to the living room where a figure laid out on the couch. I gasped and covered my mouth. Who the hell did I bring home? I slowly creep over to the couch and peer over to see Ryan sleeping soundly on the sofa. Oh god... Did Ryan and I bang? I shake my head and realize he was only missing a shirt. His jacket and shirt were with his belt hanging off the back on the recliner. I sat down on the recliner softly and quietly as I tried to think back to last night. The harder I tried to think the worse my hangover got. I kept sipping the water until something finally hinted itself back to my mind. All I could remember was getting flirty like I always do and Ryan offering to take me home. That's all I got. Ryan stirs from the couch and turns to face me. He fixes his neck position but finds it too uncomfortable to sleep so his body wakes him up. He blinks a few times before noticing me stilling there, staring.

"Not what it looks like." He tells me. I sigh and nod, drinking more water.

"I know. You drove me home and you still have your dress pants on." I point out. "That's all I know though." Ryan yawns and sits up, rubbing his cricked neck.

"Well after I offered to drive you home you got real flirty with me instead of with your ex-coworkers. Alex I think told me to take you home so I did. On the way here you kept pulling your dress up to show more of your legs."

"Did I look good?" I ask to lighten the awkward levels. Ryan chuckles to tell me I succeeded.

"I am not gonna lie, it was attractive." He admits. I smirk and drink from my cup, the liquid nearly gone and my head beginning to clear. "Anyways, when we got here and I walked you up to the door, you suddenly broke down crying and I was so confused. Then you started slurring on about your ex and I thought you were gonna do something you'd regret so I came inside and stayed with you until you fell asleep. I left alkezeltser and water for you and it woke you up when I came in the room. You told me to stay the night with you but I didn't want to intrude you so I said I'd stay on the couch. You didn't mind and so I did." When he finishes I sigh. I am awful when I'm drunk.

"I'm sorry." I say with annoyance at myself. "I get flirty as shit and I'm also needy when I'm drunk. It's quite ridiculous honestly." Ryan shrugs and runs a hand through his hair.

"It's fine. We didn't do anything stupid or regretful." He says with a soft smile. I nod in agreement and look at the time. It was nearly ten.

"I'm going to make you breakfast for putting up with me. I'll scrounge around and see if I can find any of my brothers clothes for you, too. I stole a lot of his shirts and hoodies." Ryan stands and shakes his head.

"You don't need to, I'm fine."

"Ryan, we are both an hour late." I point out. "We can take another extra hour to relax and enjoy the day." He sighs after a moment and shrugs.

"Alright." I smile and go to the kitchen to start cooking for him.

We arrived to work a little after twelve. I was thankful that no one minded since they knew I drank a lot. Geoff seemed all good. He was more hammered than me if I can recall. He seemed a bit irritated but not exactly hungover. When I walked into the office with Ryan, though, Gavin cat called with Michael.

"Coming in late together, huh?" Jeremy asks with a smug little grin. I rolled my eyes and felt my face heating up.

"Nothing happened, Drooley." I commented, using the nickname I gave him two days ago when he was drooling in a nap during lunch. He glares at me and I smirk back at him.

"Seriously, though, nothing happened. I drove her home and slept on the couch because she asked me to stay." Ryan clears up. The men eye us cautiously but when out facial expressions told the truth, they stopped. I give Geoff the notes I was told to give him by two today before going back towards my office.

I was in the office for, what, five minutes? Barbara already came in asking if Ryan and I fucked... When I told her no she said we should have. I rolled my eyes at this comment but ever since she left I've been nonstop thinking about him. He stayed when he really shouldn't have. He didn't let me take advantage of him. He didn't take advantage of me either. He draws sketches for me when he really doesn't need to... My mind trails and I feel my table vibrate with a message. I open it to see it was Ryan.

_Hey I have been needing to tell you something._

I frown at the phone. What was he needing to tell me.

_Sure, sweetie, what is it?_

This could be anything. As I watched those little dots dance in a row I held my breath. Then they stopped. My phone dinged to reveal Ryan's message.

_I don't think any of my dates will work out unless it's with you._

I caught my breath. What was he saying? Did he want to date me? I regain my breathing and quickly text back.

_And why is that?_

It takes seconds for a reply.

_Because you're my home. No body has ever made me feel the way that you do._

My face heats up and I can feel my heart pounding fast. He was using all he's got to tell me all this. He wasn't really an emotion sharer. For him to say these things was a new level for me.

_So are you saying you want to go on a date with me?_

It was a risky send but I did it.

_Yes. Tomorrow night a Pierre's?_

His offer was really hard to refuse. So I took it.

_Okay. Pick me up at seven. I'm an early bird person._

We exchange times, wear, and excited texts back and forth before finally concluding his conversation with me. I was going on a date with Ryan...


	6. Six

Why was I so nervous? I am so shaky and I'm scared of messing this date up with Ryan. Maybe because if it goes bad so does our friendship. It was only a little past lunch and I was thinking about this all day and night yesterday and then this morning. I stand from my desk and no walk to my mail box when I see others grabbing from it. I expected it to be empty except for the memos from Burnie he's been handing out. Instead, it was packed. I hadn't checked it for a couple days so maybe it's just missed paperwork. I grab the bundle of mail and take it back to my desk. To my surprise it wasn't at all paperwork. It was all fan mail. I haven't gotten fan mail before... I closed my eyes, remembering how Jack said I'd get hate mail. I swallowed hard and peeled off the top of the first envelope. My breath was held tight as I slowly opened the letter folded neatly inside. I read over it slowly and carefully.

Sam Lloyd,

Please do me the favor of showing your face one day so I can draw fan art? Also, we would all love to know your twitter account. If you thought this was hate mail please don't. Jack and Geoff might have overestimated how big the hating fan base is. We all appreciate the work you people do and we love you. Yes, even you, Newbie. Anyways, hope to see face shots soon lovely!

Sincerely,

Annabeth Howell

I smiled at the letter, tears forming in my eyes. I was in one Let's Play. One! Yet this girl adores me... I've never been adored before. It's nice... I looked at the group of letters that were scattered on my desk. There were about ten, but it was still a lot for me. What if that one was the only hate mail? I swallowed my fears and began opening letters one after the other. So many of them were nice and caring and delicate. Only two of them were rude and hateful. One mentioned staying away from Ryan and the other mentioned me staying away from Ray and Tina's relationship. Ray is my best friend and Ryan is my date tonight. Looks like neither of those will happen. I loved all these letters. I smiled wide at them when I heard a knock at the office door. I watched it open and reveal Ryan. I glance at the time and see it was nearly three.

"Oh shit time flew." I tell him with a nervous smile. He chuckles and nods, eying the papers scattered on my desk. "That's just fan mail."

"Good?" I nod my head and he smiles. "Good." He repeats. I grab the piled papers and shove them into my handbag before going to the door and turning off the lights. Ryan drove me to work so he was going to drive me home. I follow him to the parking lot, talking about different things on the way. Like our favorite movies and places to go. Mine was Deadpool and the city at night and his was Fast and Furious and the beach. Probably because Texas didn't have one... I hop into the truck with Ryan and make sure he buckles up himself first. Once it's confirmed he is I do myself.

"Why did you do that?" Ryan asks, chuckling. "Why did you make sure I'm buckled first?" I shrug and fiddle with my fingers.

"I want to make sure that everyone is okay before I make sure of myself." I tell him softly. He makes a "makes sense" face and backs out of the parking space to leave the lot entirely.

"So how do you feel about tonight?" He asks out of the silence. I bite my bottom lip a bit.

"I'm nervous honestly." I admit. "I don't want to ruin anything between us if this goes haywire." He sighs and nods.

"I feel the same really. Maybe I pushed too early... I mean I knew you for, what, a week?" I nod. "I don't want you to feel obligated to date me because of what I told you. I can wait until we go farther into a friendship." I look at him and immediately let my brain talk for me.

"Ryan, I'm not obligated to do anything for anyone. When you said those words it just made it easier to say yes. That doesn't mean I wouldn't have said yes another way or time. You helped me from the start and I keep saying you never have to but you go out of your way to help me and make me happy... It's amazing and I can't believe you don't see how amazing you are for just those little acts of kindness." When I finished, Ryan was quiet. Maybe I said too much... I look out at the small apartments I lived at and cleared my throat. "I should go inside." Ryan snapped his attention to the building and nodded before I made my way into the building.  
-

"No way!" I say laughing slightly. Ryan nods and sips on his water.

"Yep. All the way." I laugh more with him chuckling with me.

"So Gavin really did that?" I ask, still in disbelief.

"Yep. He's was a dick."

"Literally." I say, pulling out the image of Gavin in a dick costume for Halloween head-butting someone in a vagina suit. I sipped on my own water and stabbed at my steak, trying to eat it "properly". When Ryan noticed my struggling he chuckled.

"Uh... need help?" I shake my head.

"I'm just not used to eating steak like a normal person I suppose." I say, shyly laughing at my own embarrassment. He cocks his head to the side.

"What do you mean?" He questions. It takes him not even a second to know what I meant. "You mean you eat it with your hands?" I look at the other people eating normally around us and nod.

"Yeah..." I whisper. I could feel my face heating up from my own embarrassment. This steak was a bad idea. Ryan shrugs a bit and I watch as he puts down his own steak knife and fork. I arch as eyebrow and nearly gasp when it see him grab his partially eaten steak and hold it with his fingers while his teeth bit down on the meat. He pulled with his hands to detach the bitten area and smiles at me while chewing. I smiled wide and could feel my eyes glossing over with tears of happiness.

"You didn't need to do that." I whisper. He shrugs and looks at his silverware.

"I hate using steak knives anyways." I smile wide as it repeat his actions with the steak. I could feel a few people staring at us but as I watched Ryan eat his steak the way I was embarrassed to eat it, I smiled. He gave up his own comfortable state to help me. Once again, he doesn't see how amazing he is. My steak was halfway devoured when I ran out of napkins. God this was as messy as eating ribs... I got up to grab more napkins and had to stop myself from wiping my hands on my dress like I would have at home. This dress wasn't sweat pants; I can't do that. I grab a few and walk back to Ryan at the table, who completely finished his steak and was now eating some of his sides. I gave him napkins for his hands and then begin to eat my own steak and sides. Once both of us were finished, we got the check and headed towards the parking lot. I wouldn't leave until I paid my half of the bill. No I'm not saying I'm independent I'm saying that I'm not having him pay for something he didn't eat. If he wanted to split the bill he wouldn't be cheap either. I wouldn't see it that way anyways... I get into the truck, feeling happy and full. I look at Ryan and see him looking at me. We stare at each other for a moment before he speaks up.

"Buckle up." I was a bit taken aback.

"Not before you." I say, refusing to break my own habit. He shakes his head.

"Buckle up." He repeats.

"Why can't you do it first?"

"Because it's your turn to be protected before anyone else."

"But I'm not as important." The words just kind of slipped. I didn't mean to say them and I sure as hell wasn't going to let him think anything bad of me for saying it. "I mean you do a lot at work and you-"

"Just stop blabbering and buckle up, Cross." He says with a small smile to show playfulness. I sigh and nod, buckling up. I rested my head against the door and watched as lights flew by outside the truck. When I realize he wasn't going towards my house I got confused.

"Where are we going?" I question. Ryan smiles.

"That, dear Sam, is a surprise." I smirk and look back out the window. As we got closer to the bigger city lights I realized where he was taking me. He was taking me to the city. Is that why he asked where I would want to go? I smile wide and change my leaning to by on the dashboard. I watch the glow atop the hood of the truck and Ryan drives slower so I can admire it all. I mean, I've been in the city a lot but I would never get tired of how it all looks at night. It looks beautiful. During the day I can care less. At night it's... indescribable. I glance at Ryan when the car comes to a stop.

"Where are we going?" I ask, curious with excitement. He shrugs with his own smile.

"I don't know yet." He admits. I smile and get out of the truck after him. I was too excited to contain. We were going on a walk to wherever the hell our feet take us in a beautiful city of lights. As we met beside the truck I looked around the whole city. A lot of people were still out and about, but not enough to make this experience suck. I see a spot that I want to view closer and I pointed to at it quickly.

"Let's go there!" I say with a high pitched voice. When I heard it, I realized how annoying I might be right now. I clear my throat and feel my face heating up. "Sorry, I'm just really excited right now."

"Don't be sorry, Sam, that's what I wanted." I look up to him as my heart skips. I couldn't help it, but my whole body tingled and I grabbed his hand, tugging him with me to the place I saw quickly. The smile I had plastered on my face was beginning to hurt but I didn't care. I wanted to see these lights and enjoy it. We reach the bridged area I wanted to go to and I look down at the water. It swayed slightly and the side street lights glistened on it. I leaned over and watched the water move with the lights and could almost see my reflection in the darkened liquid. I suddenly felt calm. Like the whole world wasn't here right now. I glance at Ryan and see him already looking at me once again. I blush immediately and look back at the water. He was watching me happy. I bite my lip with glee and couldn't hide my big smile. I like him seeing me happy. I like him taking me here and to Pierre's. I like him helping me and caring for me when I don't feel I need to be cared for. I smiled at my thoughts.

_I like him._


	7. Seven

Last night was... Wow. After the lights, Ryan dropped me off around ten thirty. Right now I was laying on my bed, buzzed from the incredible date. I covered my face with my long sleeve night shirt and giggled at the memories of Ryan making me feel happy. I sat up from bed when I realized I would be late and went to the closet, throwing on a short sleeve black tee and a pair of jeans with some off-brand converse. I can't stop smiling when I grab my phone and see Ryan had texted me.

Thank you for last night. It was amazing.

I arched an eyebrow slightly.

But I was the only one to truly enjoy it! I will take you to the beach. I promise!

I slip my phone into my pocket and grab my purse and keys. So far, this job was way better than the bar. Alex was right... I go to my car and jump in, buckling up before backing out. The drive there was pretty much just me in a happy mood singing songs on the radio. I kept my focus on the road but I was still jolly as fuck. I pulled into the office still humming the song that previously played on the station. I was slightly springing in my step. I enter the office and greet Kara with a wide grin.

"Someone's cheerful." Kara says with a smirk. I shrug and nod.

"Yeah... I'm in a good mood." I reply.

"Well someone sent a letter to my box by accident. It was for you." She says, pushing an envelope over the desk counter. I take it and furrow my eyebrows when there's no return address. I thank her and head to my office. I don't bother stopping to chat with the people I usually do since I was already a bit late and needed to finish a drawing for RWBY. I shut the door behind me and sat down at my desk, opening the letter. When I do, I instantly regret it by the first line.

Hey, sweetheart, didn't know you were still alive. You leaving like you did sure did mess up your poor family, didn't it?

My fingers tightened around the paper. I knew my dad and brother didn't want me to leave but I did anyways. I thought they would be better off without me. My dad and I haven't spoken since I left but my brother and I talked every other major holiday. Other than that we don't communicate anymore.

Well don't worry about them, Samantha. I'm sure they are doing just fine without you. I mean, they never acted like you were there anyways. Oh, I got dirt on you. More than you think. So don't go calling the cops okay sweetie?

I could feel my breathing pick up and my head begin to pound with my heart. Who was this? How did they know about me? They almost sounded like we were close. I tried to think of all the people who could possibly be close to me and then have beef with me. I couldn't feel my body as it went numb from panic and confusion. The door opens and I'm guessing someone knocked but I didn't hear them.

"Hey, Sam, here's the new-" I look up to see Jeremy. "Woah, Sam, what's up? You're pale and shaking. Are you hungry?" I shake my head and quickly but shaking push the letter to him. It only takes a moment for him to lead. "Who's the sick fuck?" He asks, tossing the paper back in front of me. I put my head in my hands and cover my ears. I didn't want to bother him and I knew he was just doing his job coming in here but I didn't want to drag him into this. He barely knew me.

"Earth to Samantha." His voice echos past my hands and I lift my head to look at him.

"I don't know who it is! I've been trying to think of who it could be and-and-and I can't! I don't have anyone who hates me or else they would have tried to get to me earlier. I'm scared and I don't want to face this alone but I'm not gonna drag anyone into this and-"

"Woah, Sam, deep breaths and look at me, okay?" I nod and close my eyes to start breathing before looking up at Jeremy. He leans down to eye level and holds my face sternly to force my eyes to his. "You're okay. No one is going to hurt you as long as you work here. We all are a family. We all understand stalkers, obsessed fans, and hate mail. We can understand but you have to let us." I take a very deep breath and nod my head.

"Okay."

I stood from my desk at the end of the day and took a deep breath. The letter was folded up beside my computer and I just couldn't stop thinking of it. Whoever it was is going to ruin my job here. Whether I'm the one to quit or they get me fired. I take a shaky breath and hold the letter in my hand as I leave the office with everything off. I turn the corner without running into anyone and I and most make it past the Achievement Hunter office when the door opens and Jeremy, Gavin and Ryan all come out together, leaving late also. They must have been editing. Jeremy meets my eyes and gives me a reminder smile and I nod small at him. Ryan notices me and Jeremy exchange careful looks and stops.

"You two go on ahead." He tells them.

"Dint make out for too long." Gavin teases. Ryan grabs him and ruffles his hair harshly causing the brit to squeal. He releases him as Jeremy and him walk out together. Ryan walks to me and without even a hello wraps me in a hug. Usually I would try not to show my emotions but when Ryan hugged me I knew I needed it and I kind of broke. He could feel me shaking in his grasp and rubbed my back before leading me outsude. Thankfully he guessed I wasn't wanting to do this here. Once we make it to our cars, Ryan turns to me and waits patiently for the explanation. I take in and deep and shaky breath.

"I'm sorry for the whole not talking to you today thing... trust me I would have but I got this letter and-"

"Jeremy told me." He says softly. I sigh and hang my head. I wasn't sure whether to be angry or relieved. "What are you going to do about all this?"

"I guess just give them whatever they want." I tell him with a frustrated shrug. "I hate to say it but I have to."

"Why?"

"Because I don't know who this is! If I knew it I would be able to handle all this so much easier, but it's really hard when I have no idea who is blackmailing me." My breathing picks up again. "They know about my family, Ryan. They know about our family relationships... I don't want them to get hurt because of me more than they already have." Ryan comes to me already pulls me to his chest again.

"I won't let anyone hurts you or your family, alright?" He says siftly. His thumb rubs up and down on the middle of my back while I try to collect myself. When I finally do I squeeze tightly around Ryan.

"Thank you, Ryan."

"You're welcome, Cross." I smile and roll my eyes, sniffling and slapping his chest playfully.

"You're lucky you're cute." I tell him while covering my cheeks to wipe tears away. Ryan smiles and shrugs.

"Yeah, but I'm cute like what to you?" He asks. I bite my lip when I realize this is his way of asking what I wanted to be with him. As I thought back to the incredible date twenty-four hours ago I smile and think back to just a moment ago. He was my best friend for sure. People say to marry your best friend. I'm sure it works dating wise... I go up to Ryan and place my arms around his neck and shoulders. My fingers interlocked behind his neck and I slowly lean up to kiss him gently on the lips. I could feel him take and small moment to focus and kiss back with his hands on my hips. I pull back and nod I can see his blue eyes shining under the full moonlight and building lights.

"That's my kind of cute." He smiles small at my response as I pull back from him completely. Just like that my day is back to perfect. He clears his throat and tries to focus again.

"So will you be okay tonight?" He questions I shrug small and nod.

"After that I am sure I can manage." I say with a smirk. I turn to go to my car and go to the driver side. Ryan stood there smiling at me and I couldn't help but smile back. I felt like a teenager again. One magical night with one wizard of a man.

"Text me when you make it home." He tells me. See, there are certain things a person says or does to show they care about you. For example, making sure you tell them you're home safe. Another is making sure they are buckled before you. Those are just the simple things. I felt warm for a moment before nodding my head.

"You better buckle up." He chuckles and nods his head.

"Alright, goodnight, Cross."

"Goodnight, James." I retort. I slip into my car and wave to Ryan before driving off and out of the parking lot.

I texted Ryan to let him know I made it home safe and in tact. He sent me a photo of himself buckled up before he left and I felt happy by it. I step out of the shower and dry my hair when I hear a knock at the door. It was almost eight at night. Who the hell? I throw on a robe and wrap my hair in a towel. There's another knock but this time a little louder.

"I'm coming!" I shout to whoever it was. I look through the peephole and see Ryan standing in front of my door. What the hell is he doing here? I yank open the wooden frame and finish tying my robe. "What's up?" He seemed distressed suddenly and I frowned. "Come in." I demand. "I'll put on some clothes." I go to the bedroom and pull out some sweatpants and a loose top. There was no way in hell I was putting back on my bra. Even if it was Ryan. I go back to the living room and Ryan's sitting with his head in his hands on the couch. I sigh and take a seat beside him.

"What's wrong?" I whisper. He lifts his head and I can see his eyes are glassy.

"I just feel so lonely at my house." He says softly. I frown. "If just am so used to having someone and I was doing okay now and then I meet you and now the lonely is back."

"Ryan, loosing people and then gaining more comes with challenges and feeling more lonely in at crowd of people is way more common than you think. It's okay to feels lonely." I place a hand on his shoulder and he sighs heavily.

"I... I miss it." I frown again. Did he want to be with Laurie again? I don't blame him she's the mother of his children.

"I know."

"How did you cope with losing your ex?" I huffed and shrugged.

"I hate him so there's that." I tell him. "I mean, I did miss him. I loved him for Christ sake. But what I did was push away the pain and bring in bapiness. I watched people be happy. I watched them get jobs and apartments and get married and seeing someone else have the happiness I couldn't made it easier." Ryan watches me weary and then wraps me into a heavy armed hug. I gratefully accept it and this time I'm the one to rub his back.

"Thank you." He whispers. He pulls back and looks at me intently. "You're amazing." I giggle and shake my head.

"You've only known me a week calm down." I say with a giggle. He shakes his head and smiles.

"Doesn't matter. I know how amazing you are."


	8. Eight

I woke up to a nice Tuesday morning. It was nice to have a late work day after a week of different emotions flying around me. There was Ray, and then Ryan, and then the letter... The letter. I totally forgot. I look at my bag on the floor by the nightstand and blow out an annoyed breath. Nothing bad has happened. It's just a threat. I've been threatened multiple times. It was just an unproven blackmail. I picked up my phone and texted Ryan a good morning text. It took him about ten minutes for him to reply for I had enough time to get dressed and do my hair. I go to the vibration of my cell and pick it up.

Free for breakfast?

I smile and reply with a quick yes before looking in the mirror. I sighed when I realized I'd have to change. My legs were bare from the shorts I wore to reveal my leg sleeve tattoos. On both legs I had a cluster of tattoos that were all the same thing. It was birds with leaves and feathers and twigs of all sorts. These tattoos i just adored but people alqays said they made ko sense and were just a blur on my skin. I went through a lot of time and money for these but i dont enjoy theae comments very much. The night i wore a dress i wore the same leg color tights so they wouldnt show. If they did it was very very subtle. By the time I was done conflicting my thoughts and feelings, Ryan was knocking on my door. Shit. Already? I look at my legs and swallow hard. He's gonna find out sometime. I go to the door and take a deep breath before opening the door. Instantly his eyes fall to my legs and I feel my face heating up. He wore a plain black tee that was tighter around his chest and arms. He looked hot in it. I cleared my throat when he was outlining my tattoos with his eyes.

"So where to?" I ask him. He shrugs and looks me in the eyes now.

"I was going to leave that up to you as long as I can pay." I am about to protest but he shakes his head. "No, I'm paying and that's final." I bite my lip for a moment and finally give in. Last time we split the check so I was okay for now. "So leg tattoos?" He questions. I nod my head.

"Yeah, not a lot of people know about them." I reply.

"Well I dig them." I smile and feel my stomach flip. "They look good on your legs. Did you get them recently?" I could tell he was referring to not seeing them the night of the celebration. I shake my head.

"No, uh, my bare legs were actually tights. I hide my tattoos so people aren't always saying shit about them." Ryan chuckles.

"Well I honestly don't give a shit." I smile wider. "Come on, let's go." I nod my head at him and grab my keys, locking the door behind me. I hop into his truck and wait for him to buckle when I remember he won't buckle up before I do. I buckle myself before he gets into the truck so he gets in smiling at the sight. I return the grin and watch him do his own buckle and back out if the drive.

We made it to McDonald's and I ordered a Big Breakfast. What? I was hungry... Ryan ordered a McGriddle and a milk while I had Chocolate milk to wash down all my hotcakes, sausage and eggs with and biscuit. I look up from my tray and see Ryan chewing with a small amused grin on his face. I instantly begin blushing.

"W-what?" I stutter nervously. Ryan eats his last bite and shrugs, looking back to me again once finished.

"There's just so much mystery in you and it's intriguing." He says with a small laugh. "I want to know more about you, Sam." I finish eating my hotcakes to start on my eggs. I move my shoulders and move my fork around in the eggs.

"What do you want to know?"

"I don't even know." He chuckles. "That's the fun part. I get to learn about you all the time without even meaning to. For instance the buckling up, the tattoos, and the way you eat your steak were all things I didn't intend to learn or find out about you." I felt flattered. Ryan was being so excited about learning about me. It was an incredible feeling. I haven't felt it before. Not with Adam or any of my other exes.

"Well I enjoy learning about you, too. I mean, the only thing I learned without intention was that you like my tattoos." He chuckles at my comment along with me. "But you really haven't shown me anything to learn. Mine were mistakes." Ryan nods as I finish off my eggs and go to my sausages.

"So do you want to learn something right now?" He questions. I arch an eyebrow, interested. He takes my expression as my yes and smiles.

"I really like to be calling you my girlfriend." I blush deeply instantly and nearly choke on my food. I don't mean that as in it was the wrong thing to say I'm meaning it wasn't expected. We're we official? I mean we were dating...

"So you mean you want us to be official?" I question. Ryan shrugs slightly and nods.

"Well, yeah. I mean, I really enjoy being with you and when you helped me through my loneliness that was nice, too." I totally forgot about last night. I offered for him to stay but he didn't want to intrude anymore than he already thought he did. He really didn't and truth be told I wanted him near me last night. Especially when he was hurting. I know how it feels to miss someone like that.

"Well I'd love to go official with you." I said with a smile and a fast heart beat.  Ryan grins widely and I bite my lip at his expression. He was so happy and it was such a nice view. I glance at the time and see it's nearly eleven. I groan and sigh at the same time. "We have to go to work." I complain. Ryan chuckles that adorable laugh and nods.

"Yeah, but at least I get to tell everyone we're official now." I smile and roll my eyes slightly. This man will be the death of me.

"Fucking finally!" Michael yells. I arch an eyebrow at him and laugh.

"I've only been here for a week and a half, Mikey." I started to call him Mikey after I got his name wrong the first day. He shrugs and points his thumb at Ryan from over his shoulder.

"Yeah but that dick wouldn't shut up about you and saying he was gonna ask you out." That must have been why he got the guts to text me what he did. Michael comes closer to me and leans in for a whisper. "I honestly am happy for you guys because Ryan needed to move on and I'm sure you did to." I would usually be offended, but I realized Michael was right. Both of us needed to move on and each of us were moving on together.

"Both our hearts and souls need to move on so this is nice." I reply with a small smile. Michael pats my shoulder and then his eyes wander to my legs. He already complimented my tattoos, but he was looking at them again.

"I'm sorry for staring I just really fucking love your ink." I smile wider and thank him. He walks back to his desk when Gavin walks in the room.

"Are you ready for a Play Pals, my boy?" The brit asks with a quirky grin. Michael nods at him and laughs menacingly.

"You're gonna hate this one." Michael replies. Gavin's smile falls and his shoulders slump.

"Michael..." He trails. You could almost hear the despair in his voice. "What is it?"

"It's a game, you idiot."

"You know what I mean!" Gavin argues. Michael chuckles again and shrugs.

"Five Nights Four came out last week." Gavin instantly takes in a deep breath and groans. Michael just laughs in his seat. "Dude, come on, let's just play." As they sit down together to set up the recording devices, Michael tells Gavin Ryan and I went official.

"They were dating?" I can hear him ask quietly.

"Yes, you fucking idiot!" That was Gavin's nickname at this point. Ryan stands and goes to me with and grin on his face.

"So, can I announce this in a video anytime soon?" I am about to reply when I thought comes into my mind.

"What about hate mail?" Ryan frowns slightly and nods.

"There will be hate mail and tweets and shit, but those don't matter. I promise. And I'll try to work it to where the Let's Play can be recorded today but not come out until you're ready." I bite my lip and glance at the others. Michael and Gavin screech at the screen when Teddy Bears with red eyes move across the screen on the bed. I look back at Ryan.

"When would it come out originally?" I question. He shrugs and thinks about it.

"Probably tomorrow morning on early afternoon." I try to think of if I might be ready for the announcement then but I honestly wouldn't be able to tell. I guess it's better to get it out if the way...

"Tell you what," I start, "if someone brings it up you can say we are together. Other than that keep quiet." Ryan nods and I lean up, pecking him on the lips. "Okay, I gotta go check my emails and finish up on a comic for Red Vs. Blue so I'll see you after work?" Ryan nods and I smile wide. I leave the room and head towards my office, excited that Ryan and I are official.

I get a call through the office phone and pick it up after two rings.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Sam, it's Miles." I furrow my eyebrows. He _never_ calls. I straighten up in my seat.

"Oh hey, Miles."

"So I heard you and Haywood were officially together." There's a small pause. "Don't worry, you aren't in trouble, almost everyone who is a couple here met through Rooster Teeth. The only thing I request is for you to please keep it professional."

"Yes, sir." I reply small. Miles chuckles.

"Dude, it's fine you don't have to be nervous!" I smile.

"Well you never call! It was scary." He laughs once more.

"Well anyways, just keep it professional and put work before your relationship inside the office. Outside I couldn't give a damn." I nod my head. "And be careful with what you do or say around the fan base." And there's the fear again.

"Okay. Thanks, Miles." We exchange goodbyes and I hang up on my line. I look back at the PC and see my drawing half colored. It was nearly done but I still needed to send it in. I finished off the colors to get the base stricter for the producers to look over and I put in the quotes from the new script to show what scene was happening. Once satisfied I sent it in. I leaned back in my chair and felt my phone vibrate on the desk. I look at it and see Geoff had texted me.

Hey Sam, congrats with Ryan. He also won't stop talking about your leg tattoos with Michael. I would like to see them. I want to see if they are that cool.

I laugh a bit at the end and stand from my desk. I shut the door to my office behind me and go straight to the Achievement Hunter office. The On Air light was off and it looked like they just finished recording. I go I've to Geoff and sit in the spare chair to the side, rolling over and proping my legs up on his desk. It startled him a bit, but he looked nonetheless. He smiled and began to look closer at my tattoo details.

"Badass, right?" Michael asks. I blush and giggle at his compliment. "I just can't get over how girly but intense they look."

"How much did you pay for these a leg?" Geoff asks. I try to think back.

"Um... About five hundred a leg?" His eyes widened and I shrugged. "Look at the art. The man was a beast." Geoff nods in agreement and I sit up, removing my legs from the table.

"Hey, so I'm having a party at my house." Michael speaks up. "Who wants to come? It's tonight at seven or six, whatever time you want." Jack, Gavin and Jeremy all say they can make it so I shrug.

"Hell, I guess." Michael nods and glances to Ryan.

"I mean if she's going don't I kind of have to?" The men chuckle and did I shrug.

"You don't have to, James, it's okay." The men look between us and Michael speaks up again.

"James?" He laughs.

"Is that what she calls you during sex?" Jack asks, laughing. The men join in, including me. Ryan's face turned a tint of pink and I felt embarrassed for him.

"We haven't even done that yet!" He defends.

"Well then she will call you that when you do." Geoff comments. I roll my eyes and ignore them. If I was going to Michael's then I need to get ready.


	9. Nine

"Welcome to my house!" I shout loudly over the music while finding my way through the dancing drunks. It was eight at night and the party started about two hours ago. People instantly started getting wasted. I on the other hand had bartender instincts and was cleaning up after everyone and mixing drinks for them. I wasn't really one for drinking. I mean I did drink one or two whiskey shots but I'm just on a high buzz. I was jamming out with my head bobbing and my fingers were numb at the tips from the alcohol. I felt a tap on my shoulder as I put the cups in the sink and begin washing them for Lindsay to not have to deal with them later. I turn my head to see Michael. He already tried to tell me to stop but I refused and he left it alone knowing I was wanting to do this. It was my job for so long...

"Hey, um, fuck..." He was hammered. He closed his eyes to think. "Ryan. He wants you outside by nine." I frown and look at the clock. It was already eight-thirty. Why did he want to leave so early? Nonetheless I nodded. I finished up the drinks I was mixing and washed whatever cups I found. Luckily we didn't run completely out of Solo cups so I wasn't washing cups nonstop. Once completed I glance back at the clock. It was eight-fifty now and I still had time for me to say goodnight to everyone. I went to Lindsay and Michael and thanked them, Lindsay drunk but not Michael drunk.

"Bye, guys!" I shout over the changing music. They give me a confused look and I decide to ignore it and walk away from them. I go to the front of the house and see Ryan waiting for me by the truck.

"Hey." I greet. "You ready to go?"

"Are you?" He questions. I furrow my brow.

"You told me to be out here by nine..." I remind him. Ryan shakes his head.

"No, you told me to be out here by nine..." Suddenly I am drenched in cold water from head to toe. I screech and spin to see Jeremy and Gavin are holding a bucket that once contained the liquid that now covered me. Ryan was completely dry however and had a wicked grin on his face. I narrow my eyes at him.

"You didn't..." I mutter. Ryan shrugs and crosses his arms over his chest. Gavin places a large bucket in front of me and it was filled to the top with water balloons. Ryan smiled wide when he saw my expression change from shock and anger to revenge and glee. I crossed my arms back at him.

"I'll give you five seconds." I tell him. He takes off in a bolt across the front yard to the side of the house, ducking into a bucket like mine. I count in my head as we both arm ourselves and fire. Within minutes, Ryan is soaked like me. I feel two other water balloons hit my torso and ass to see Gavin and Jeremy with water balloon buckets also.

"Unfair!" I call, hiding behind a tree. I bite the top part of the water balloon as others crash into the bark covered trunk I used. I pinch the part I bit and tossed it out, water spewing from the hole and circling to hit all three of them like a water grenade. I smirk and grab more balloons, seeing Meg, Gavin's girlfriend, and Kat, Jeremy's wife, all firing away with me.

"Girls rule, Bitches!" Meg yells, pelting every man one by one. I laugh and fire at Ryan, hitting him on the face. He makes a stunned face but fires one right back at me and hits the boob spot on.

"Fuck!" I shout, grabbing the pained area. Ryan and Jeremy laugh but not before they are fired at. We were down to the bottom of our barrels and we were all six cold and wet. I took one hefty balloon and chose my victim. Poor Gavin. I fire away and it lands directly where I aim.

"Sam!" Meg shouts. "I want kids you know!" I laugh and Kat rolls her eyes slightly.

"One is enough!" She shouts. She was drinking slightly so her voice was high pitched. I gasped and stopped in my laughter. Meg didn't have a kid. Kat. Meg doesn't have a kid. Meg. You don't have a kid. Meg's smile widens at my expression and I tackle her in a hug. Over the two weeks I've been at Rooster Teeth, Meg was my best girlfriend along with Lindsay and Kat. I wasn't close to any of the other ladies yet. To hear Meg was pregnant... Wow. It was like celebrating my sister being pregnant! I glance at Gavin and run to him.

"You're gonna be a dad!" I yell, pulling him to his feet. He was hunkered over in a little pain still. "Oh shit, you're gonna be a dad. That baby is screwed."

"Hey!" He says defensively. I roll my eyes and straighten him up.

"I'm kidding you Bloke!" He smiles and I take him into a hug. "Dude, being a parent will be the greatest feeling. Don't fuck it up." I warn. He nods and then looks at me in confusion.

"You're a mom?" He asks. I realize I never told anyone but Ryan about my miscarriage and shake my head.

"I almost was." I tell him. It seemed like everyone but him was understanding what I meant. I sighed heavily. "I had a miscarriage." He nods his head in acknowledgement and pats my back.

"Well we might name out baby Anne." He tells me. "That's what Ray calls you right?" I smile wide and cover my mouth.

"Oh my gosh, please don't do that what if you guys don't like me that much? That's a big deal." I tell them. Meg walks up with everyone else around us soaked.

"Well when naming a kid you realize just how many people you hate." She tells me. "We were going through so many names and ended up saying no to all of them because we either hated someone with that name or didn't fit it with the middle name or last name." I laugh a bit and nod.

"I was going to name my baby Katie. Then I said no because I knew too many Katies and hated all of them." They laugh and I spin to Kat and Jeremy. "No more surprises right?" I ask. They shake their heads and Kat laughs a bit.

"Not yet at least." I smiled and hugged them anyways. All of these people were my best friends. I love them all. I turn to Ryan and can hear Titanium playing loudly inside the house, Michael somewhere outside in the group yelling it loudly. I'm sure the neighbors enjoy him singing drunkly into the night. Ryan smiles at me and yawns a bit.

"You ready to go now?" I shrug and nod.

"I suppose so." He smiles and puts a hand on the middle of my back, leading me to the truck. I wave goodbye to all my friends and get into the truck, a towel laying out on the seat. "How long did you have this planned?" I ask when he slides in with a towel under him also. He smirks.

"Long enough." I roll my eyes and smile wide at him. The ride back to my apartment was quiet and mostly just radio music lowly playing at our feet.

"That was fun." I say, smiling. "I find out my best friend is pregnant, a surprise water balloon fight, and I got to clean up for Lindsay and Michael. It was nice." He glances at me and smiles differently. It was more affectionate somehow and it threw me off. It made my heart pound harshly for a second and then relax.

"It was nice to be able to see you have fun." He replies quietly. I smile wide again and look at my jeans, which were starting to rub again my legs painfully.

"I gotta get these jeans off soon they really hurt."

"I can help you." And there's flirty Ryan. He's been getting more flirty lately and I know it's him opening up to me more. I laugh and nod.

"I'm sure you can but maybe another time." I reply with a small smile. It would have been nice but not this early. He nods and sighs very dramatically.

"Okay I guess." I roll my eyes and playfully shove his unoccupied arm. He chuckles lowly and I can feel my spine tingle. That was such a beautiful sound. I loved hearing his laugh. He did it so often but I never got used to it. It always gave me the same feeling.

"I mean, maybe..." I say, instantly changing my mind to letting him help me. His eyes dart to me and he pulls into the apartment parking lot.

"So- so I uh..." I laugh a bit and nod.

"Yes Flublord," I say, using his office nickname, "I mean you can help me out of them." My voice went low and full of a feeling I hadn't felt in a while. God maybe Lindsay and Geoff were right. I need to get laid. I shrug when Ryan doesn't respond. "The offer is up there. It always will be. Just let me know when you wanna take it up." I get out of the car and he is still speechless. I smirk as I walk slowly to my apartment to give him time to decide. When I get to my apartment I look out and see him starting the truck up and backing out of the parking spot. I frown and sigh. Maybe he didn't feel ready. I look at my wet body and go to the bathroom and grab a towel and my robe from the hook. I strip on the way and pick up all my wet clothes after I throw on the robe and wrap my hair in the towel. I grab my phone and debate whether or not to text Ryan. I decide quickly.

Hey so I realize that I might have urged you on... I apologize for my behavior and hope this doesn't change how you feel about me.

I sent it. I realized that Ryan might have been nervous. He just got out of a divorce of over eight years marriage and more through dating. I was only dating him a week... God I'm like a slot or something. After tonight, though, I knew I chose what I wanted and it's not gonna change. I stare and my phone until I see the light shine on the screen.

It doesn't change anything bad. It changes everything to be good, trust me. I tried so hard to not go in there. I actually turned off the truck to go after you but I changed my mind.

Well at least he wanted it. I am about to text back when I hear a strange noise. It sounded like a whooshing noise. When I saw something moving under the door I realized what I heard. A piece of paper slid under the door and I went to it slowly, cautious for whoever stood outside or if they left. I grab the paper and unfold it. As I glance at it I sigh. Great.

Hey Sammy! Glad you're doing well. So you and Ryan huh? What a big ordeal that is. You know the fans will find out. They always do. Maybe they will hate you now and so that will take sweat off my back. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed my last letter. You're following instructions so that's good. Keep following them. My plan is falling into place and soon you won't need to worry about anything anymore. Forever. I'm sure that this is a frustrating situation for you. Don't know who I am... How I know about you... Well I don't know you. You don't know me. Never did and never will hopefully. I wouldn't want to know someone like you. I bet that water balloon fight was fun tonight. It sure seemed like it. I'll see you soon, Samantha.

I swallowed hard, tears of fear and anger rushing down my face. I placed the paper on the table and covered my face. Who could this be? It has to be someone at the office... The writer didn't say "us" when they said fans they said "them". Maybe she isn't a crazed fan and just a crazed co-worker. And sweat off their back with the hate? What? And if they don't know me and I don't know them how do they know so much about me? I bite my lip and debate whether to call Ryan for help. I grab my phone and call up his contact.

"Hello?" His voice was groggy as if he just woke up. Shit. I sniffle a bit and swallow at the knot in my throat.

"Hey were you asleep?" I ask. There's a bit of movement and I could tell he was.

"No, why what's up?" Little liar. "You okay?"

"I got another letter." He sighs heavily.

"Do you want me to come over?" There was more movement now and I knew he was getting ready to come over anyways. I nodded when I realized he couldn't see me.

"Yeah I would like that, please." I honestly was scared. There was a death threat in that letter. Either on Ryan or me.

"Okay, I'll be over in a little bit." I felt bad for waking him up but I'm not gonna lie I wouldn't be able to sleep with this letter lingering in my head. Within minutes Ryan is walking through the front door. He stops when he sees me in just my robe. I pull it to be more closed and feel my face heated.

"This isn't why you came, James." I remind him. He chuckles and shrugs.

"I don't mind seeing it though." I roll my eyes and lead him over to the letter. I hand it to him and he takes a seat, reading it carefully. At the end he slowly places the letter down and sighs as if he had and realization. That's when it clicked that he might have had one.

"What is it?" I ask, hoepful. He looks up at me and swallows visibly.

"I have an idea of who it could be."


	10. Ten

*WARNING: SEXUAL CONTENT/SMUT

"I have an idea of who it could be." He admits quietly. He didn't seem happy about it, but I listened in. "The reason the job was open... There was this girl who was downright the best P.A. we ever had at the company. Before you anyways... Her name was Hannah and she had an unhealthy obsession." He shivers and I feel as if I know what the obsession was. "I mean, the girl was talented as hell and everything was always done before the deadline and yet she ruined it by getting obsessed with me. I thought everyone was just being crazy because the girl always brought me gifts and shit, but I never thought more of it because she was a fan at one point before she joined us. Then as she got to know me personally she got really possessive. When Laurie would be brought up in a conversation she would act like she didn't even exist. It was then that I realized that she was obsessed with me. Like it all threw itself together. When I told Burnie about it, he said he would want to hire someone before firing her. Usually that would take months, but you were instant to apply and you had the skills to replace her maybe even better. So when you went in for apply interview Burnie told me about you and I already wanted Hannah gone. So the day you came in is the day she got fired. The same day. Same office and everything." Now that he mentioned it, I remember passing up a woman with blue eyes and black hair the day I came. I thought she worked in another department and I never saw her. I shake a bit at the thought and look to him.

"So she's trying to get to me or you?" Ryan sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

"I don't know but both of us or in danger if it's her." He tells me. I frown and can feel the tears coming back. Ryan notices my emotions change and wraps me in a hug. "Sam I'm sorry you got dragged into this. I really am. Everything was going great." I sigh and pull myself together.

"It's fine. I mean we both are fucked up sometimes so it's normal to have a fucked side of life." He chuckles and rattles my body with his chest. I pull back and look into his blue eyes. They were so perfect it actually made me mad.

"I hate you." I whisper. He looked hurt for a moment. "You're so perfect." His face relaxes and he laughs lightly once more.

"Honey you don't even know me then." I arch an eyebrow.

"Did you just call me 'honey'?" I ask. He smirks.

"I might have."

"Well I prefer something better than that."

"Dear?" I laugh a bit.

"I'm not fifty, Ryan." He laughs this time and thinks for a moment before leaning close to my ear to where I can feel his hot breath on my ear.

"What about Baby?" Okay. Normally that would be cute. But you didn't hear the way he said it. It was so stretched out and purred that I swear my room fell to ice from how hard it shivered. Ryan noticed and I felt him laughing against my neck. I couldn't control my body right now and it was pissing me off. Was this Ryan's way of saying he was ready? I cleared my throat and looked at him directly. His lips were parted slightly and I swallowed thickly. God he was so... everything. So handsome, sexy, cute, funny... I hate him for being so perfect. My thoughts were covered by a wave of 'fuck's and 'kiss me's as I stared at him more. Finally he took the hint and moved forwards, pressing his mouth firmly on mine. I smiled at the feeling of what I wanted and wrapped my arms around his neck quickly. My robe was beginning to feel loose around me but I didn't care. I closed the blinds already so that part didn't matter. We both knew where this was heading. Ryan pulled back and smirked.

"Can I take up that offer?" I laughed and nodded, him slowly taking a hand away from my waist and unraveling the robe's tie. Before he removed the string fully I stopped him. My stomach lurched from my own actions. I wanted him to do it, too. Something inside me stopped me for a moment.

"Should we really do this?" I whisper. "I mean are you really wanting this?" Ryan smiles small and slowly but softly places his lips against mine again. When he pulls back it's as if I'm dazed.

"Does that give you an answer?" I smile when I realize he used the same way I answered him when he asked if I wanted this relationship. I nod and sit up more, grabbing his hand and pulling him off the couch. My robe was really loose but not opened enough to show personal areas. Just the cleavage and my stomach. He eyed it the whole time he pulled himself up. I tug him to follow me and find our way to the bedroom. I gasp in surprise when we don't even make it in the bedroom door and he has me pinned on the wall outside of my room. I smirk, enjoying the feeling from innocent to dirty that Ryan had switched to quickly. He runs his hands under the robe slowly and grabs the back of my thighs, picking me up and pushing me against the wall. My heart was racing and my body was shivering from the wanting it had for him. I grab a handful of his hair as his head buries into my neck and bits lightly but also harshly on my skin. I bite my lip at the pleasure it sent through my body. It's been too damn long since I've felt this touch and feeling. His hands were holding my thighs so tight I swear it will leave bruises. I could feel his erection against me and rub the best I could against him. He muttered a few profanities and pushed against me harder. I gasped at the sudden move and yanked his head from biting me. I crashed my lips onto his and felt him trying to inch his fingers closer to my throbbing area. I stopped him before he could and shook my head.

"Not yet." I whisper. He groans and I can tell he's getting sexually frustrated. I smirk and put my fingers between his waistband and unbuttoned the top of his jeans, slowly undoing the zipper. My heart was beating quickly and I was nervous. I never actually knew if I was good at this... I'll find out soon enough. I reached into his opened jeans and began to palm him, twirling us so he was on the wall now and I was pressed against him.

"That's better." I bite lightly at his neck and I can feel him shaking under my touch.

"S-stop teasing." He demands. I arch an eyebrow and laugh a bit.

"You think you're in charge?" I ask. He opens his eyes and looks at me with a determined look on his face. He quickly grabs my wrist, pulls it out and twists me to be back on the wall with my hand behind my back. He puts his head in my neck again but doesn't make a move to bite or kiss the tender skin. Come on, Ryan... Instead, he chuckles lowly in my ear.

"It's funny that you think I'm not in charge." I swallow hard at his husky voice and my whole body shakes. He bites hard on my neck and then pulls away, smirking evily. He points to the doorway. "Go." When I hesitate, he grabs my hips and presses my own hips against them. I moan and gasp in the same moment and he pulls his head back slightly. "I said go." I nod my head and do as told, low key enjoying his dominant side. He follows me close behind and watches me as I'm about to climb on the bed.

"Robe." He says firmly. I back up from the bed and turn to him. He comes over and slips his fingers between the strings and pulls them apart slowly as if opening a gift. The strings fall and reveal my middle, but the cloth still hides my breasts. His hands go underneath the robe on my shoulders and he pushes it off, revealing my breath fully now as the robe pools on the ground. He stands there and takes in the sight in front of him. He drags his hands across every bit he can touch and smiles as he does. Once he was satisfied, he nodded.

"Okay, go to the bed." I do as told while he strip from his jeans to only be in his boxers, which come off shortly after. I smirk and when he is about lay against me I reach down and grab him firmly. He takes in air quickly and clenches the sheets into fists. "Fuck." I begin to slowly pump him, twisting my hand slightly as I do to give an all around pleasure. He takes deep breaths and I push him backwards, him too weak to fight back. He sits on the bed and I get on all fours atop the mattress, leaning into him. I lean my head down and stop my hand, pulsing it before placing my lips just on the end. He was shivering from my touch and it was such a great feeling. I finally took him in completely and he folded over slightly. The bed was moving from his crumbling of the sheet and I would moan every now and then to vibrate him. He Sucks in more air and attempts to grab my hair but he couldn't balance without his other hand. I such hard every now and then but most of the time I swirl my tongue around him. His legs were quivering and he was getting weaker as I went. As soon as I got him where it want him, I stopped. He made a noise of disapproval and reached out to me, shoving me backwards onto the mattress. I smirked as he climb atop of me. He slipped his arm between us and I can feel him slowly move his fingers down until they hit my built up swelling. I gasp at the touch and he laughs slightly.

"My turn." He moans into my collarbone. I don't argue as he massages me in ways I haven't felt before or don't remember feeling. I shivered and shook from the pleasure and pressure he applied every so often. He swirled and shook me but I just couldn't quite pick the one I liked him doing most. All of it was amazing. As he was distracting me with a clit rub he slipped an unexpected finger inside and I nearly shouted in pleasure. He grins and laughs slightly at my willpower slowly crumbling. My stomach was tight and my hips were aching as I rocked against his movements. It felt amazing and I just couldn't explain it. After a moment and me losing control, he stops at the same pace I did. I make the same disapproving noises he did earlier and he smirks.

"Not so fun is it?" I shake my head. He leans back a bit and tears the tin foil of a condom he had hiding in his hand probably from his jeans. He slides the rubber on and climbs back on me. He thrusts himself forwards, surprising me to gasp and grip his back with my nails. They dug in deep but the pain only made Ryan scoot inwards more and harder. I scraped down his back to try to calm myself before finally fixing myself around him. My legs wrapped around his hips and my arms stayed wrapped around his torso, clawing and scratching down his back. He would moan every time and bite my neck, which caused me to scratch more. I was starting to think we both couldn't control our bodies and we were just going with it. He moved faster now, shaking the bed more. I would gasp at every deep thrust while he just grunted. My stomach ached now and I was climbing the ladder which I'm sure he was close to meeting me at the top of. I began to moan and shiver the faster and harder he thrusted. I lean up to his ear.

"Harder." I demand. He nods and does as told, slamming into me by now. I would lose my breath at each hit but gain enough back for the next one. On the fifth hard thrust I grab his hips and hold them in place. I thrust against him and rub harder, causing my climax to speed up from the rubbing on my clit and his dick moving deep inside me. He grunts in pleasure and presses as hard as he can against me. I smirk and finally feel each of us getting sloppier. After a few twists of my hips, he gives in. I smile and take a deep breath, releasing every bit of myself I could. We lay there together, sticking to each other and sweating heavily. Ryan pulls himself up and slowly removes the rubber from himself. The bathroom was across the hall and so he tossed it in the trash there and came back after cleaning himself up. I was still laying on the bed, losing consciousness from the pleasure rocking my body to sleep. I feel his lips ghost over my skin and I giggle, it tickling me. I scoot upwards to my pillow while he climb on the bed also. Both of us were happy, or so it seemed. I watched Ryan get comfortable on my bed and smiled, scooting over to him and tossing my leg over his. His arm went under my head and the other went to rest on my hip. I outstretched one arm over his chest while my other one stayed cramped between his body and mine. It's only been a week, but it felt like I'd known Ryan for a year after that. Sex causes people to either get closer or realize they are wrong for each other. I believe we got closer throughout all this. Because it's not the time you spend together, it's the moments you make or share in that time. When I glance to Ryan dozing off naked beside me I smile. I was happy to be with Ryan.


	11. Eleven

Ryan and I woke up in my bed, giggling and smiling about last night. It was almost ten and it was a Saturday. It was nice to have a day off with him. Especially in a morning like this. I poked the end of his nose with a wide smile set on my face. He chuckles and runs his hand lightly over my ribs. I shiver at the touch and he sits up, gliding them slower to end up making me snort. He smiles wide and begins to actually dig his fingers into my sides and I howl in laughter.

"Ryan!" I shout, laughing. He only grins wider and tickles me more. "Haywood you stop?" I try to make him stop with the joke but he only stares at me with a small laugh of evil and continues. "James!" He finally stops but not before doing a finale tickle all the way from my armpits to my stomach and back up again. I am riddled with shakes from the excitement and watch him fall back onto the bed with a satisfied grin. I roll over to face him with a grin of my own.

"Let's go out for breakfast." I suggest. He thinks on it for a moment and shrugs.

"Alright." I sit up from him only to be pulled back down. "But I want you first." I shiver at his tone and the breath on my ear but I pull myself together.

"Hm... After that tickling I don't know..." I say with a small smirk. He eyes me and tugs on my again.

"Come on, Cross, I know you want to." I laugh a bit and look to him.

"You calling me Cross is weird when we have sex." I inform. "We aren't secret lovers." He shrugs and sits up with me.

"It would add the secrecy feeling." I roll my eyes and lean over, kissing him gently.

"Come on, we aren't doing this sex craze thing early in our relationship." I tell him softly. "I want us to build up and then do it. That way we know what names we like." I wink at him and can see him shiver slightly. He must have thought of it.

"Okay, Babe." I smile at the pet name and go to the closet, pulling on pants and a loose green shirt. It over hung with a still tight waist band and sleeve cuffs, but the shirt was really large and baggy which I loved. I pulled my hair up in a bun and looked at my desk with a mirror on the back. I pull out the stool and sit down when Ryan speaks up.

"Are you gonna do your make-up?" He asks. I look at him through the vanity mirror.

"Yeah. Why?" I question. "Should I not?"

"Well I don't think you need it but if you want to put it on go ahead." He tells me. "I want to watch." I smile and can feel my cheeks heating up.

"If you haven't noticed I don't go all out unless it's for a really special occasion."

"Well breakfast with me is special." I roll my eyes and laugh.

"You know what I mean." I open my caboodle box to reveal my drugstore make up sets. I grab liquid eyeliner, pencil eyeliner, and mascara with red lipstick. Red looked good with my hair and white-ass face. I applied the pencil eyeliner to my waterline and top eyelid on the inner lashline. I then took the liquid and surrounded my top eyelid in a wing with only a slight bit on the outer corner of the bottom. When I looked at the wing in the mirror, I groaned. Not gonna be able to perfect that again... I moved on nonetheless and did my mascara. It blinked onto the brush until I was satisfied with the volume. I then moved over the the other eye and repeated the process. Ryan was watching my intently in the mirror as I kept cleaning off the mishapen wing from my eye to match the other one. I finally got it close enough and my eye was red and burning. I ignored it like I do every time and moved on to my lips. I lined them with the red lip liner and then filled them in before applying a matte red lipstick I found that I love so damn much. Once filled and dried I dabbed off the excess and slipped my finger in my mouth to remove the inner lipstick that slipped past me. I glance at Ryan as I did and saw him twitch in his seat. I knew he thought I was doing it on purpose. So I did. I slowly pulled out my finger and wiped the red off the end of it. I smirked at him only to have him roll his eyes at me. When I was finished I stood from my chair. Ryan stood from the bed in his jeans from yesterday and shirtless.

"Well that was an experience." He comments. "Why the wing removal though?"

"Wings are hard to match. We don't wake up with perfect wings, Ryan." He chuckles at me and nods.

"I know now." I smile back and lean up to peck him on the lips but he stops me. "Will that stain my lips?" I laugh and shake my head.

"No." I wipe my finger across it to reveal no lipstick is coming off. "See? Dry." He nods and kisses me, but still pulling back on the incase. "Alright let's go get breakfast."

We pulled up to a place called Perko's Café after stopping by Ryan's for him to change from his dirty clothes. I was sitting in the booth across from him and looking at the different food offerings. Once I had mine picked out of put the menu down and sipped from my water. Ryan already picked his and we were now just waiting for our waiter.

"Have you ever been here?" He questions before drinking some of his water. I shake my head.

"Never even knew it existed."

"Yeah me neither." I smile when I realize he wanted to take me somewhere we both never went.

"So it's like a new adventure." I say with a smile. He returns it with a nod.

"That is a nice way to think of it." Ryan looks to the waiter as he comes to the table. The young man glances at me and asks for my order first before turning to Ryan. After we order what we planned he gives a sour fave to the back of the waiter.

"That kid was giving you glances." I look over my shoulder at the waiter when the looks finally clicked. That was Caroline's little brother. He had a crush on me when I first started working at the bar. I turn back to Ryan and laugh lightly.

"Are you really jealous of a twenty six year old man?" Ryan shrugs.

"You're only four years older than him." He replies. "You could enjoy the younger type." I roll my eyes playfully.

"You're five years older than me. I can say the same thing to you." I retort. He laughs lowly.

"Touche."

"Besides he was looking at me because that's my ex boss' brother." I smirk and eye Ryan. "He had a big crush on me." He narrows his eyes at the kid and I can't help myself but laugh. "I'm with you not him. Leave the poor guy alone." I tell him softly. He days some choice words before nodding.

"Yes, Dear." I snorted at the pet name and he smiled at it. He liked calling me that I guess. Lance, the waiter, came back with our food and I finally spoke to him.

"So Lance when did you stay working here?" I ask with a wide smile. It was mainly at Ryan's jealous glare.

"I started a little before Caroline hired you." He replies while placing down plates in front of us. "I haven't seen you during shipments at the bar."

"Yeah I work at RoosterTeeth now. You still do shipments with this job?" Lance nods.

"Yeah. Caroline needs money all the time so I help out the bar." I frown as I hear this. Caroline needs money? Lance leaves the table sheet a moment and I look at my food. Caroline needs help and I quit.

"You okay?" Ryan asks to snap me back to reality. I look up and shake my head.

"Caroline needs help and I left."

"They asked you to." He reminds me. I sighed heavily.

"I gave up so easily. It's stupid." Ryan shakes his head.

"It's not stupid." He says sternly. "It was important and needed to be done." I nodded my head knowing he was right.

"You're right." I admit. "I am not at fault." He smiled and chuckled at me.

"That's my girl." My face immediately heats up and I can feel my whole body melt into a puddle of joy. I enjoyed the cute things he said like that from time to time. They were unexpected and cute.

We finished our meal and I was quite satisfied. Right now we are sat in Ryan's house just talking about ourselves and funny stories. I glanced around the house. It seemed so empty...

"Such a hollow house." I comment. Ryan sighs and nods.

"I need a roommate."

"Well my lease is up in six months." I report. "Let's see if you still need a roommate then." His chest shakes me slightly from his laughter.

"We shall see, Cross." He replies. I smile and lean my head against his collarbone.

"I enjoy spending time with you." I admit. "Is only been a week but is nice. Especially when we aren't forced to see each other at work." Ryan nods in agreement.

"Did you finish the rough sketch yet?" He questions. "You know, with Michael and Lindsay?" I nod my head excitedly. "When is it due?" I sigh and throw my head back.

"By five today." Ryan furrows his eyebrows.

"But you're of today." He reminds me. I shake my head.

"I'm never off officially." I half joke. I was serious at the same time. "I always send in drawings to make sure I don't fall behind from an emergency."

"That's pretty smart but unnecessary."

"You'll think otherwise when an emergency happens." He shrugs, knowing I was right. "They have more drawings from me than they can print or post so I think this will be the lady one for a while. I need to deal with my stalker." I muttered the last word and Ryan sighs heavily.

"Just ignore her. What dirty secret could she possibly have about you?" I bite my lip and swallow quite hard.

"There's only one secret that I can think of." He stayed quiet. "When my mom died... I-" I stop and debate whether to tell him or not. He placed a hand on mine and sits up straighter.   
"You don't have to tell me, Samantha." It was the first time in a long time he called me by my name. It mage me know how serious he was about the conversation. I shake my head.

"You don't understand- I need to tell someone that I can trust." I whisper. "Adam was a mistake." Ryan nods and I take a deep breath. "When my mom died I started acting different. Like not the rebel teen but more of a mother figure to Steven. He never knew mom. I was with her for about six years before she died during Steven's birth. For the longest time I watched my dad blame my little brother for my mom's death. I was only six and my dad..." I paused.

"I became my brother's and my own mom. When Steven turned ten I was sixteen. Dad was better. He didn't blame Steven anymore and so I found that as an okay view to leave him alone at home with Steven long enough for me to get a job. I couldn't get a job at sixteen without a work permit. I had to start working the only way I saw fit anymore. I..." my breathing got shaky but I pushed through. "I started trying to sell myself to strangers. Men, women, whatever got me money."

"Is that what she could have held against you?" Ryan's voice was gentle. I nodded slowly. "Well what got you out of it?" I smile small at the memory.

"There was a guy who saw what I was doing. When he asked how old I was I freaked out and said I was eighteen. He looked my age but I wasn't taking chances. He told me I was lying and he didn't want me to lie to him. When I told him I turned seventeen he gave me a little piece of paper with his number on it. When I got home that night I texted the number and he told me all about himself. So I did the same in return. After a while of talking and a week of meet ups, he told me to dress well on that Monday morning and go to GameStop." I chuckled. "Turns out he got me an interview. Little Ray Narvaez Jr. begged his boss to hire me. When we said baby friends we meant teenager to adult. Because we had a fresh start together. He was really hard into doing drugs and drinking but he quit if I worked for GameStop. So we both got clean."


	12. Twelve

Periods. Suck. Ass. As I sat here in the office, whimpering about my trying-to-kill-itself uterus, Ryan was trying to make me eat. I would eat and usually never show signs of cramping pains, but right now was the top ten pains I have ever felt. Right below heartbreak and above breaking my arm.

"Babe, just eat dammit." He mumbles, beginning to get frustrated. It wasn't helping that I was getting irritable myself.

"I'm fine. You go eat and I'll meet you later for lunch."

"But you need breakfast." He argues. I sigh and sit up straighter in my seat when the cramps subside for the moment.

"Just don't worry about me, okay?" I ask. He groans slightly but nods anyways.

"Yes, Dear." I smirk at the name. "What?"

"I just like when you call me that..." I trail. He chuckles and shrugs.

"Well I like you." It was such an obvious statement hence we were a couple, but it still made me feel flattered and like I was going to die from how hard my heart skipped.

"I like you, too." Ryan stands from the chair beside me and bends down, pressing his lips against my forehead.

"I'll see you at lunch, babe." I nod and watch him exit the office. I sat back in my chair and sighed deeply. I was enjoying my time with Ryan and I couldn't feel much better than I do right now. Sure I was cramping and wanting to just cut into my stomach, but the time I had with Ryan always made me push through this kind of thing. I went back to thinking about a week back when I told him about how Ray and I met. He told me that no matter what anyone says, he knows I've changed. That I'm a better person than when I was young. Adam didn't even know about this and I was with him for over two years. Ryan and I have been together for what? Two months now? I felt strong with Ryan. With Adam I felt giddy and with sparks. That's not what I was told to feel. I was told to feel secure; To feel safe... And I did. I felt as if I was right where I needed to be.

Ryan and I were sitting in the parking lot, the cold night air shaking my body. What went wrong? I try to think back to why we were out here in the quiet city landscape and what we were talking about. I wish I couldn't. I wish it didn't happen.

"So what are we going to do?" Ryan whispers. "You need to give me a solid answer. An answer that you're sure of." I bite my lip to stop tears from shedding with all the strength I could muster.

"I honestly don't know yet..."

"Well, Cross, I need one." The silence was frustrating for both of us. The situation was not a big help either.

"Could you please not call me that right now?" I whisper shakily. It was from both frustration and sadness. "I can't exactly cope with anything cute or funny right now, this is very serious." Ryan sighs and puts his hands up in defense.

"You're right, I'm sorry." He apologizes quietly. "So really, what are you going to do?" I sigh and run a hand through my hair.

"I have to go. I have to make sure Steven is okay and that Dad is alright."

"You know they are okay-"

"They are my family and they were in a wreck. Apparently they aren't okay if someone else had to tell me!" I finally break. I never yelled at Ryan before. He just stands there and stares at me.

"Sam, I understand, but please don't yell at me. I'm only trying to help you."

"Then come with me." I whisper. He looks stunned for a moment.

"What?"

"Come with me. I need the emotional support."

"I can't just leave work. They can understand if you do, but babe, I can't do that." He tells me with a sorry tone. I sigh and nod.

"Alright. Well I need to contact Geoff in the morning then. Maybe I can talk to Ray and he can go with me..." Ryan smiles softly and comes over to me, wrapping me in his arms.

"I promise that this is going to be just a big freak out and your dad and brother are fine, Sam." He kisses the top of my head and I suddenly feel calmer. "Taking Ray would be a good idea. You guys can bond again." I nod and grab my keys.

"I'm gonna head home. Goodnight. I'll text you when I get home." He nods and releases me. We say our good-byes and separate to our own vehicles. I buckle myself in and take a deep breath before driving off and heading home. The whole time I tried to keep my head clear and I just couldn't it seemed. It was always wondering how my family was coping. Before I realized it I was sitting in my car in front of my apartment for five more minutes than I should have. I travel up the stairs, wondering about when I should go. I'm sure I should leave ASAP, but I need to see for how long... I hope Ray can go. I unlock the door to my apartment and take in a deep, shaking breath. Dad and Steven better not die. I have so much to tell them and apologize for. I lock the door again behind me and go to the bedroom. After I change out of my clothes and plug in my phone, I go to Ray's contact. After four rings, he picks up.

"Narvaez Jr." I smile at his greeting.

"It's Anne. You got a minute." I say quietly.

"Alright, you're too quiet compared to your loud self." He notices instantly and I sigh. "What's up?"

"Do you want to go to New York with me?"

"You gonna see your Fam Fam?" He asks. I laugh lightly and nod.

"Yeah, but not in the good way." I whisper. The atmosphere of the conversation suddenly turns cold and I hear him audibly swallow hard.

"Are they..." He trails and I know what he means.

"No, no... At least that I know of." I clear up quickly. "It's just that there's been a wreck and if they were fine, I wouldn't have had to have my Aunt Pearl tell me about it."

"When do you want to go? I need to let Tina know and maybe the fans I don't know yet. Doesn't seem appropriate."

"I'll call Geoff in the morning. Right now just let her know that you're wanting to go. I'll give you a for sure time and day."

"Alright. Goodnight, Anne."

"Night, Ray." I hang up the phone and see my phone ignored a text message from Ryan while I was on call.

Did you make it home?

Shit. I forgot to text him. I reply quickly with a simple 'Yes, sorry' and wait for a reply. My phone buzzes, but this time in the way of a call.

"Hello?" I ask softly.

"Hey," Ryan starts, his voice giving me a warm feeling to help with the cold night. "I called Geoff. He said take however long we need. When do you want to go?" I sat up slightly.

"Wait, you said 'we' need." I point out quickly. "You're going?" He chuckles lightly.

"He asked if I wanted to and I told him what I told you. He said fuck me and my decisions, I'm going with you. So here I am. Did you call Ray?"

"Y-yeah." I stutter, happiness filling me. "He said he's cool to go. Just needs to know when."

"Alright, so do I. When do you want to go?" I bite my lip and sigh.

"What about Wednesday morning? I mean that gives us all tomorrow to pack and buy tickets and be ready."

"That sounds fine by me." He replies. There's a bit of silence between us for a moment. "Hey, Samantha?" Oh no. My whole name. What did I do now?

"Yeah?" My voice was so small I'm sure he knew why. Silence again.

"Get some sleep." Something told me that wasn't what he wanted to say. My heart was pounding. I knew exactly what he wanted to say. Him telling me what he did though said enough. I smiled light and nodded.

"You too." My tone was like his only a little quieter. We hung up the phone and I rolled over on my side, texting Ray the details. I locked my phone and laid flat onto my back, staring at my ceiling. My life is like a damn drama. I got a stalker, a popular boyfriend, a dysfunctional family, and crazy friends. All I'm missing now is the big decision. I just hope that whatever that decision is isn't going to happen soon.

I woke up the next morning to my phone ringing like crazy. It was only five in the morning. What the hell? I groaned and pull it off the charger, answering it.

"Yeah?" My voice was so rough and groggy.

"Sam." That voice... "Wake up and pack your things right now. You need to come home." Mom?

"Mom?" I whisper. There's a heavy sigh and I hope to God I'm wrong.

"No, Sweetie, it's Aunt Sapphire. Listen, Uncle Rudy and your father are fighting because Steven..." She trails and I know exactly what she was trying to say. I swallow hard and nod my head.

"Okay I'll see what I can do." I hang up the phone and quickly dial up Ryan. After five rings, there's a muffled noise and he answers.

"Hello?"

"Wake up. We need to leave now." I say quickly. "My aunt just called and Steven isn't doing well at all and my uncle and Dad are fighting-"

"Woah, woah, okay just slow down. Go ahead and call Ray and tell him we need to go." He says with a soft voice. I take a deep breath or two and nod.

"Okay."

"Now just call him and I'll get ready." I nod again and hang up, switching to Ray's contact. I immediately call him up. He doesn't answer so I call again. This time it's after two rings.

"What?" He mutters. I stand from the bed and hold the phone between my ear and shoulder while rummaging through my closet and dresser.

"We are leaving ASAP. My aunt called and said that Steven isn't doing well and my uncle and dad are fighting." I throw clothes onto the bed for me to wear and then separate clothes for the days I stay there.

"Uh... Alright I'll let Tina know and maybe I can get get a ride to your place?"

"I can pick you up no worries. Ryan is coming too by the way. Geoff said for him to come." I mention. Ray chuckles.

"Alright, I'll go ahead and pack up and get ready." We hang up and I begin to pack whatever I could manage right now in my heap of panic. I couldn't understand why I though my aunt was my mom. Maybe because they are sisters. Maybe because their voices are both so calm and soft and like there's never a problem in the world. Sapphire and Rudy belonged together. One was like fire and one was like ice. They mellowed each other out. I tried to think back to what my mom last said to me.

"You're gonna have a baby brother." She said. "You're gonna look out for him against bullies, help him through heartbreak, and in all, love him. It's just a sister's duty." I've done just that. I beat up this girl who was telling him he was fat and no one loved him. She was older than me by maybe a year or two but I kicked her ass. Of course she beat me up a bit, too, but she didn't get up for about ten minutes. Steven said it was embarrassing but also knew he couldn't do it himself quite yet. When his first girlfriend cheated on him, I had to help him and tell him that not all girls are like that. Some are but not all; Just not to let it ruin his view on love. Now as I'm packing up my clothes and anything else I might need, I see that I love my brother because I am doing this for him. I'm coming home for him. I left for him...


	13. Thirteen

Ryan's POV  
  


My heart pounded as I looked at the hospital in front of me. I was concerned for Sam. She felt like she couldn't do this...

"Samantha?" I hear a voice ask. I spin to look to my right with Sam. A dark man with dark auburn hair that came into an Afro nearly was standing with a woman who had long white blond hair and she clinging to his hand tightly. Sam let out a shaking breath and ran to the couple. After a moment apart from Ray and me, she comes to us with the two older couple trailing behind not too far.

"Aunt Sapphire, Uncle Rudy, this is Ryan." She introduces, allowing me to jut out my hand to shake her uncle's hand and kissing the top of her aunt's. Sapphire and Rudy look over to Ray, who of which took them into a hug immediately. Great... Now I look stupid.

"Ray!" The woman yells in excitement. "Boy, Greg and Steven miss you like mad!" I look at Sam and can see her face fall. I grab her hand and give it a reassuring squeeze. After a while of just catching up, the couple leads us inside and up the hospital stairs to the second floor and down the hall. We all stop before the door and silence strikes us for the first time.

"We already did our visits. It's about time we head out." Sam and Ray nod while I had no say. Ray was practically a brother to Sam and kin the rest of the family it seemed. I was the boyfriend she came home from Texas with.

"You go in first." Samantha tells Ray. I eye her cautiously, hoping she doesn't flip out and back down from seeing him. Maybe Ray will come out with reassurance. Ray nods and enters the room with two knocks before. Sam begins to pace and finally I had enough. I grab her arm and pull her to my chest. I rub my hand over her back and hold her tight as she shakes against me. I haven't seen her like this before. It's crazy... I didn't think she would ever look this way.

"He's okay." I whisper. She shakes her head and tries to pull away but I don't release her.

"Don't lie to me to try and make it better." She mutters. "Saying that and then me believing it makes it worse." I sigh and nod, pressing my lips to the top of her head.

"Okay, I'm sorry, but it's what I believe." She's about to speak from the way I feel her head move but is stopped when Ray exits the room with a relieved look. He comes over and takes Samantha into his grasp and forces her to look at him.

"He's way better than you think..." Samantha smiles wide and I can see her trying not to cry. She hugs Ray tightly and grabs my hand, pulling me to the room with her. I follow as she reveals a wide room with a bed in the middle. There were Machines on each side of the metal railings on the edges of the bed. In the sheets was a young teen whom had dark brown- nearly black- hair and brown eyes. His skin was a fair color much like Sam's. They shared a lot in looks, actually. They could have been twins if I didn't know better. There was another man with long hair that was balding at the top. He had a farmer's tan and a gut that hung just slightly. He was wearing a wife beater and shorts with sandals. That must be Greg.

"Sam?" Steven speaks up and I feel Sam's grip on my hand tighten. She smiles wide and nods.

"Steven, yeah, it's me." She walks impatiently to the bed. "God I thought you were gonna be a potato." He huffs and winks at her. Well, with that swollen eye and cut to make it worse, he looked like he was permanently winking.

"I'm a strong potato. You see what shit I put up with..." He mutters. Greg glares at his son and I can't help but chuckle, which grabs everyone's attention. I stop immediately and clear my throat.

"I'm Ryan." Steven and Greg then look heavily towards Samantha. "Don't worry, Cross- I mean, Samantha, asked me to be here."

"Did you just call my sister her last name?" Steven asks. I shrug and nod. "Yeah it's a just a nickname she prefers at work." Steven smirks with his busted lip and nods.

"That's awesome."

"Not really." Sam says, laughing lightly. Greg still glared and I knew he was upset. Why? Sam sensed the tension he had and sighed. "What, Dad?"

"Oh, nothing..." He lies. He clearly had more to say and he was set on saying it shortly after. "It's just that you come home after so long of bailing on us and you bring back a new boyfriend? What happened to Adam?"

"Dad, Adam was a dick and everyone saw that but you." Steven defends quickly. Sam slowly reaches down and grabs his arm in a way of protection. I knew then that I needed to stand closer in case protection was needed.

"Adam was a good man!"

"Adam was an ass!" Samantha shouts. "Ryan never called me a bitch or an asshole. He's never said I work too much as an insult instead of a joke. He's never hit me!" Greg's face changed along with the emotion in the room. Steven and Sam both hung their heads while Greg and I stayed silent in shock.

"He what?" I whisper. Greg had nothing to say now. No one did. Sam sighed but didn't speak. Steven did instead.

"Look, it was once. Just once. It was a bad thing that she went through and accepted. Just drop it, okay?" I stare at her brother and know exactly why they hid it when my eyes fell to Greg next. His face was red, his jaw was visibly tight, and his hands were in fists. "Guys, I'm healing. Can't we ignore this situation for right now so I can enjoy having my sister back? Please?" His voice was weak and my body softened. Greg's expression faltered but he was obviously pissed still. "Just save it for later, Dad." The man snapped out of his position and groaned.

"Fine." He huffed before going to a seat and sitting down. I glanced back to Sam, who eyed me cautiously and full of sorrow. We had a lot to talk about.

We left the hospital without a fight thankfully and Steven was passed out from the morphine. Sam was in pieces once we left and I couldn't understand why. Ray met us back at the hotel and once we were there, Sam hugged him. So why was I here?

"He's doing fine, Sam." Ray tells her. "I've never seen Steven so happy." She nods and wipes her eyes.

"I know... But him and Dad always fight now. Maybe it's because I left."

"You said it's been this way since your mom died." I pitch in. She turns and nods.

"It has but maybe it's gotten worse and I didn't know it. They were fine until I left, or so I thought." She admits. I knew she was heartbroken about all of this but I couldn't find the right words. Ray offered to go and get some snacks from the vending machine to which we accepted and gave him money. Once he left, I hugged Samantha tightly.

"You know we have a lot to talk about, right?" I ask. She nods in my chest. "Okay so for right now, we are going to wait. It's killing me, but this is not the place nor time to speak of it." Samantha nods her head once more and I sigh.

"I love you." She whispers. My breath caught in my throat and I swallowed hard. Was she saying what I thought she was saying? It was only two months and she was saying it. Should I say it back? She is probably terrified, thinking I don't love her back. Do I? "Ryan?" She whispers, making me realize I haven't replied.

"I-" I cut myself short, still thinking. Was I ready? I have to be. I went into a relationship and I knew this would possibly come from it. I took a deep breath and new my answer. "I love you, too." Sam pulls away from me and I expect a happy look on her face, but instead it's hurt and annoyed.

"You don't have to say it just because I did..." She mutters, crossing her arms and avoiding my glance. I furrowed my eyebrows.

"What do you mean? I didn't say it because you did. I said it because I do." Her eyes quickly snapped to mine and began to stare as if looking for if I was lying or not. I smiled and chuckled lightly. "I love you, Cross." My voice was low and by the tears that suddenly came to her eyes it was like she was a teenager hearing it for the first time. She dove onto me in a hug/kiss and then just held me there. Ray walked in, mentioned something about privacy, and then walked out, throwing bags of chips at us. We both grinned and I kissed the tip of her nose.

"You know, you're a big cutie sometimes when you really shouldn't be." She comments. "It pisses me off." I laugh at that and I hear an adorable noise come from her for the first time. A snort. A little, barely heard snort.

"Did you just-"

"Don't mention it or I will murder you."

"Snort?" I ask, finishing my delayed sentence. She glares at me playfully and I immediately take the opportunity to try and make it happen again. I dive my fingers into her ticklish spots and wriggle them, causing her to burst into fits of laughter.

"Ryan!" She squeals. She covers her mouth and I tickle in a different area. That causes her to suck in a deep and quick breath, making a shivering motion in her nasal cavity. She snorted again. And again. It was almost continuous now.

"Do we have a pig?" Ray's voice boomed, opening the hotel room door again. He sees the commotion and runs to us on the bed. "I didn't know you snorted when you laughed!" Sam's face was blood red and she was panting with a giant smile on her face.

"Oh shut up, Ray!" She laughs out. I cease my torturing and she takes a moment to sit up, playfully socking me in the shoulder. When she made a disapproving face, I smirked and snorted at her. She and Ray both started to laugh loudly at my action, making me slightly confused.

"How was that so funny?" I ask.

"Do it again!" Sam begs. I shrug and do as told, snorting. She points at me and lays her head on Ray's shoulder, him uncontrollably laughing also. I've never seen him laugh this much... "Y-your nose... It g-goes up so high!" Samantha explains. I smile wide and continue to snort my nostrils until Sam covers my nose and Ray shakes his head, face red from his laughter. "S-stop you doofus!" She says, laughing in her words. I shrug and nod, both of them beginning to regain the pale color to their faces. Well, Ray brownish and Sam pale. The room falls silent finally, but not the bad kind.

"So no sex tonight, guys." Ray tells us abruptly. I wriggle my eyebrows at Sam, who of which rolls her eyes with blush covering her cheeks and ears. "Oh god no. Not unless I join in." Sam laughs and shakes her head.

"Not again!" She states. My eyes widen and her and Ray look at me. Sam shakes her head while Ray laughs once more at my expression. "No no! Not like that!" She quickly corrects.

"Cross, that wasn't what it sounded like to me." I state jokingly.

"I swear, not like that!" She laughs out, Ray holding his gut now. "Ray, help me explain!" Ray slows his fit and breathes deeply, nodding and fixing his glasses.

"Okay, so when her and her best friend in high school met, she had a big crush on me. Not An, but Sarah. She was her best friend." Ray clears. I nod and wait for him to explain further. "When we were at a party, all of us got a little drunk and Sarah told An that she had a big ass crush on me and Samantha decided to tell her that she liked me for a while. So her drunk self tried to plan a three way. Me and An didn't know that was her plan so when she invited us to her car for the night so we wouldn't drive drunk, we didn't expect to almost be raped by her in the backseat." I couldn't help the laughter that escaped me.

"You guys accidentally almost had a three way?" I ask. Sam nods, embarrassed slightly.

"Yeah and then when Sarah came to the next day, we explained why we were staying kind of far from her. When I told her that Ray and I are dating and it wasn't okay to do that, she was all bitchy and tried to get with Ray. Nonetheless, Ray got some puss for a night and I lost a best friend."

"Wait, you two dated?" I asked, catching a very much left out bit of information. Sam rubbed the back of her neck and Ray shrugged.

"I mean, we tried..." He admitted.

"It was during the time we worked at GameStop. We tried it out, thinking maybe we could be more than friends. We dated for like two weeks and after we finally kissed we found it too awkward and stayed friends. Now here we all are, talking about the awkward situation once again." Sam explained. Ray chuckled.

"I actually told Tina about that and she thought it was hysterical." Sam snickered while I just sat there. These two dated and now look at them. Best friends as if it never happened. I smiled and felt lucky to have these two with me on this trip. I wonder if Samantha feels the same...


	14. Fourteen

Samantha's POV

We were home. Steven was back home and Dad was happy to be safe and sound with his son again. Steven looked so much like Mom... I forgot just how much. He had her ringlets of hair, her nose... Even her laugh. God no wonder it hurt Dad so much to see him in pain and why he hated Steven when he was born.

"Cross." My focus snaps up to Ryan calling my name. We were all sitting in the office, everyone staring at me.

"Hm?"

"Yo, are you okay, Sam?" Michael asks, furrowing his eyebrows. I clear my throat and nod.

"Yeah, fine. Just jet lagged, you know?" The men clearly weren't convinced but I didn't care. I was fine.

"Anyways, Geoff asked if you wanted to join us in Minecraft." I nodded and smirked.

"Sure. I'll kick all your asses." Matt Bragg and Andrew Panton were in the room, Matt holding pieces of paper and Andrew filming.

"Okay!" Geoff shouts while I load up Minecraft on my Xbox. "So uh..." I joined the game request and loaded into the world of what looked like the recent Let's Play field of Creeper Soccer X.

"What are we doin' Geoff?" Jack asks loudly like he always does. I snicker at the normality of it.

"Why is there a nether portal in the middle of Creeper Soccer?" Jeremy questions. Ryan then begins to throw meat through the portal, going to the other side, and seeing no meat had landed on the ground. Jack was continuously jumping through the portal back and forth.

"Where does the meat go?" Ryan questions. I crack a wide grin and see my character sucking up the meat Ryan throws. Geoff continues to explain the Let's Play while I focus on not getting caught stealing Ryan's steaks.

"Alright! Go in the portal." Geoff declares. We all pile in, Jack first. He mentions a question mark and not much else before the others join in. Once I get inside, I immediately notice the colors and set up.

"This is fucking Monopoly!" I yell.

"No!" Michael screams, throwing his head back. Ryan sighs heavily and places his head on his desk while Jack gets excited with me. Jeremy suddenly dives into Lava off the side of the game board while Gavin admires the pieces in front of the set up areas. Geoff was laughing hysterically. 

"Hey, Ryan?" I ask when the complaints mellow down. He makes an acknowledging noise. "I got your meat." Gavin chuckles at that and Ryan smiles wide.

"Why do you have my meat?"

"Because she's your fucking girlfriend, Ryan!" Michael laughs out. "She owns your meat." Blush flushes both Ryan's and my own face. No one knew we slept together yet. Hearing them mention sexualized things now was just embarrassing.

"Do you think Ray is somewhere out there feeling sad and he doesn't know why?" I smirked and nodded.

"Oh yes. Ray hated playing Monopoly when we first met. I'm sure nothing has changed." I tell him. Jack laughs lightly.

"I don't think he's sad suddenly. I think he just popped the world's biggest boner and doesn't know why." Everyone chuckled at that and I just smiled wide. I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned to see Andrew, recording with his phone to send for Behind the Scenes footage. I smiled wide and waved at the camera. He shook his head, telling me they needed me to go to the office and draw an emergency design. I frowned and leaned into the Scarlett microphone.

"I gotta go do designs, but maybe Braggy-Boy can fill in?" Matt arches an eyebrow and chuckles.

"I mean I could..." We quickly switched places and everyone waved me off. I went out the Achievement Hunter office and up to my own, taking a seat and immediately opening up my drawing application. As I tried to think of what to draw, my office phone began to ring.

"Hello?" I asked, picking it up.

"Hey, Sam," Burnie's voice came through the phone. "I've been meaning to talk to you. That girl... Hannah." I tensed at her name. "She stopped by to tell me you were threatening her?" I arched an eyebrow, fury raising inside me.

"Actually, Mr. Burns, it is the other way around. I have letters to prove it."

"Woah now, Cross, it's okay. I know you well enough to know you wouldn't threaten someone. She was obsessed with your boyfriend, remember?"

"Yeah, I noticed." I scoffed out. He sighs on the other line.

"Well anyways, I said I'd talk to you about it, so that's the only part I am doing. Is she still sending you threats?"

"No, actually. I don't think she has for a while. Not since I came back from New York."

"She didn't seem too concerned so just leave it be and maybe she realized you aren't gonna put up with her bullshit." I smiled and nodded.

"Yes sir, Mr. Burns." Burnie couldn't stand it when I called him that for some reason.

"God dammit, Cross, I'm your boss. Call me Burnie." He muttered. I laughed lightly and ended the conversation with him. I continued to draw on my tablet, finally getting an idea. I was going to draw Burnie yelling at me as I just smirked. I got the outline done and I started to plan out the coloring scheme. Burnie would be red faced and I would be blushing all sweetly with a big grin on my face. He better love this one.

 

Burnie came into my office, looking like he was ready to throw a fit of laughter.

"You know, this is lame shit, right?" He asks, holding a print out of my emergency design. I shrugged and nodded.

"Yeah." I admit. "But you like it, right?" He laughs slightly and nods.

"I'm sure the fans won't get it, but you and I definitely do." Burnie pauses. "I would like to keep this one if I may." I smile and nod.

"Be my guest." Burnie smiles again and walks from my office. I check my emails to see one from Barb.

Hey loser,

We need you to help by sending in something that isn't like a comic, but more of a design right now. We love it, but we need another thing. Maybe work with photoshop and do something with one of their faces.

Barbara

I frowned but agreed to the asked proposition. I open up the app and think of who I am going to work with. I decided to step away from the focus of the popular people and go towards the littler ones. Elyse and James have been a good runner up for designs. Plus there aren't many of them together. I decide to drag in a picture of the two together and draw a little heart in the air between their heads. I then write underneath "The Willems" and smile at it, changing the picture to look black and white with deep shading. That should be good... I decide to do about four more. One had Matt Bragg, one had Trevor, one had Mica, and one has Ashley. Matt's said "I really like to Bragg", Trevor's had "I'll be Collin you tonight", Mica's had "Pink hair, don't care" and then Ashley had "I will Burn you". I know Mica's is the only one without a name pun, but I wasn't that clever with the other three. I do the same coloration for those four and send them all out to Barb. She emails me back almost immediately.

I have trained you well...

I laugh a bit at that. I mess around on the drawing app for a moment before my phone goes off. It was a text from Ryan.

There's a party tonight at Geoff's. Griffon took Millie to her mom's for the weekend. Wanna go or are you tired?

I think about the offer and bite my lip. I was pretty tired, but I also wanted to let loose after such a stressful week. Maybe I will be able to relax afterward with Ryan, too. That would be nice. I smile and text back a positive response before getting ready to end my shift for the day. I close off all the systems and save whatever I needed to, packing up and locking my office behind me.I wonder over to the Achievement Hunter office and am immediately greeted by Lindsay and Meg talking. Meg quit a while back, but she still came to visit when she had a chance. Everyone missed her here. Everyone always said Meg and Ryan were fucking on the side which I laughed at, but Gavin wasn't too excited when it was brought up. I guess he was a jealous type.

"Hey, girl!" I say. "How's being pregnant so far?"

"Kill me." Was all she said, causing me to laugh lightly.

"Just wait until you get to three months. It's all shit from there."

"It gets worse?" She exclaims. "Poor Gavin..." I give a confused face.

"She kicked Gavin out of the bedroom last night because she wanted to have the whole bed to herself after he walked to Taco Bell and got her a quesadilla." Lindsay explains. I laugh at the story I was told when Gavin comes out of the office beside us, yawning. He looks at Meg, smiles, and places an arm around her. Meg had a slight belly, her being nearly three months pregnant now, and Gavin liked to kiss her temple before placing a hand on her stomach for a second. It was as if he was saying hello to their unborn child, too.

"So are you guys going to Geoff's tonight?" I ask. They all nod, Gavin yawning again. "Brit, you better get some sleep instead of partying tonight. Maybe Meg will share the bed tonight."

"I promise I will, Gavvy." Meg says, kissing the end of his nose. 

"I'm fine. It's not the couch that killed me- it was the damn walking to Taco Bell. I need a license." He complains.

"Well I'm sure that if the baby has Meg's nose it'll be an easy birth so win-win." I comment. All but Gavin laugh and I can see him frown in embarrassment.

"My nose isn't that big!" He defends.

"Yes it is." The door opens for Ryan's voice to be heard and I smile at him. He kisses the top of my head and wraps an arm around me like Gavin did with Meg. Lindsay looks between us all and shrugs.

"Guess I'll have to wait for my husband to come and do that, too." After a few seconds, Michael emerges and we all wait for him to repeat the loving process. To not much of a surprise, he didn't.

"Come on loser, let's go home. I'm tired." He tells her. This causes us all to laugh, including Lindsay, and watch as Michael grabs her hand, kissing her on the lips and leading her to the door. I look at Gavin and Meg exit after them and am about to follow with Ryan until I feel his arm wrap around my waist and him spin me to face him. He presses his lips to mine softly and I smile wide when he pulls back. My face was now flustered from his action and I couldn't help the excitement it gave me.

"What was that for?" I question. He smiles back and shrugs.

"I just thought you needed a kiss." I nodded and got to my tip-toes, kissing him again.

"I did, thank you." He nods and follows me out the door, arm around my shoulder and mine around his hips.


	15. Chapter 15

Geoff's party was pretty much like Michael and Lindsay's except I got really hammered. I remember talking to Ryan about going home late and then I remember getting home. I guess I invited Ryan in because he was sleeping naked beside me. I rolled over closer to him and ran my hand down his spine. His body twitches and then finally shivers under my touch. His head picks up and he smacks his lips together a few times before smiling at me. He flips to his stomach and places an arm behind my head.

"Hey, uh..." I start, clearing my throat. "I don't remember last night much." Ryan sighed and shrugged.

"Well, you invited me in and as soon as I got inside you started flirting. When I said that you shouldn't tease me, you did and it just kind of went heavier from there out." I smiled and trailed my fingers over his chest.

"It's hard not to tease you when you look this good." His low chuckle rumbles and I immediately feel myself grin wider.

"Well thanks, babe, but we need to get up." I frown and lay my head on his shoulder again.

"Why?" I whine.

"Because we work at eight this morning and Geoff knew that. Everyone knew we worked early today and they said fuck it." I groaned and picked myself up, the blanket hooking over my boobs and hiding them. "You look so sexy." He comments, making me smirk.

"I bet I can look even better..." I trail while pulling the blanket just low enough to hid my nipples but still reveal the top of my breasts. I open the blanket and fling it off my waist and hide my crotch while the blanket shows everything else. He bites his lip before reaching out and pulling me to him. I squeak with a laugh in surprise and lay myself on his chest.

"Like I said, don't tease me." His voice was low and purred in my ear. I swallowed thickly and cleared my throat, putting a finger on the center of his chest.

"You also said we have work at seven." He frowns and smacks my ass under the sheet, causing me to jump. "Haywood!" I whine. He chuckles again and I get off of him. Don't worry, I got off nice and slow to tease him more. He was frustrated the whole time but I couldn't help it. With a man that damn attractive... Mm.

 

At work, Almost everyone showed up late. When I complained to Ryan we should have done the same, he only shook his head. We were two important people to the company. He did much more than Let's Plays. He was an editor, a podcaster, and an all around needed guy. I was working with merchandise, social media releases, and now they recently put me on animation for Camp Camp. I loved the show so far and it was a great choice. Michael and Lindsay were trying to tell me last night to draw a new camper for me to voice in the show, but I knew it would be too suspicious for me to suddenly fall into the show. There's a knock at my door and without looking up from my screen, I call the knocker to enter.

"Sup, bitch?" I glance up and see Miles. Well shit. What did I do now? "You done with your character yet?" I furrowed my eyebrows at him.

"Wait- what?" I ask. "My character?" He gives me the same confused look.

"Yeah..." He drags the word out. "Last night Michael and Lindsay told you that you should be in Camp Camp, right?" I nod my head. "So draw a character and I'll send it through with the rest of the cast and crew." I stared at him.

"Things that were said last night should be ignored because I was drunk."

"Never stopped anyone from getting a good idea- Wait, no, that's bad. Never mind. You know what I mean." I laugh and nod.

"I guess I do..."

"Great! Now, get to it." With that, Miles leaves. Well alright. What should my character look like? Should she look like me? No. That's dumb since all the characters are exact opposites of the way the look and act and that's what I have to do oh my god I'm so dumb. I mentally slap myself and open the drawing program on my desktop. I grab my tablet and begin to sketch out my character to them. I had colored hair. Maybe she should be really dark like Max. I mean, Michael and I were practically the same with skin tone and hair color. I groan and put my head on the desk. I need advice before I spend hours just on this little side project. I grab my phone and call the Achievement Hunter office. Ryan, Jeremy, Jack, and Matt should be there by now. Whoever answers shall help me.

"Yo, what's up." It was Matt.

"Matt." I drag out the A in his name and he sighs.

"Whatchya need, Sam?" I smile and sit up.

"What would my Camp Camp character look like?" He hums in thought and I can almost hear him shrug.

"Honestly, all I can think of is a replica of you." I sigh and shake my head.

"That's too self-centered."

"Well that's just my opinion!"

"Give the phone to Jeremy." Matt shuffles around on the other line before I hear it stop.

"Sup."

"What would my Camp Camp character look like?"

"Um..." He pauses and makes a noise of exclamation. "You would have your natural hair color- Red right?"

"Yeah."

"And then instead of brown eyes, you could have blue or green."

"Okay."

"Then for your skin you can have yourself get a little tan." I smiled and wrote down all the details he had given me.

"Thanks Jeremy!"

"No prob, girl." I laugh and hang up the phone with him and go back to the tablet. Shit... What height should I be? How big should I make myself? I look at the desk phone. I'll look stupid if I call again. Then again, this office is made up of stupid people sometimes. I call again. This time Jack picks up.

"Yo."

"Jack!" I shout. He chuckles.

"Yes, Samantha?"

"Jeremy helped me with the looks, but I need a height and weight for my Camp Camp character."

"Well you're tall."

"But I don't want her to look like me."

"She's your character!" I whine at his protest and he sighs. "Here ask Ryan." There's shuffling like there was with Jeremy and Matt before Ryan answers from it.

"What's the deal, Cross?" He had a happy tone to his voice and I smiled wide.

"Well, dear, I need help."

"Dear?"

"Shut up." I say quickly when I realize what I said. "Anyways, what height and weight should my character look in Camp Camp?"

"I thought you weren't going to do that."

"Miles convinced me..." I trail. He laughs deeply and hums in thought like Matt did.

"Make her short. I mean, she's a kid right? So make her short and skinny because all kids are fucking twigs." I laugh at that and know he's right. Kids never gain a pound it seems.

"Thanks, Rye-Bread."

"You're welcome, Cross." I hang up the phone and go back to drawing. The character would be short and skinny with blue eyes, tanned skin and- Fuck. I slam my head on the desk and groan in frustration. I should really write my shit down. I call back the office and receive the funniest shit I have ever heard from their mouths.

"I swear to god, Samantha Lloyd Cross, if this isn't the last time you call we will cut your phone line. What did you forget this time you forgetful fiend?" It was Matt's voice. I laughed loudly at his tone of voice and how annoyed he sounded.

"What if it wasn't me who called?"

"You're the only one who calls!" Jeremy shouts. I gasp.

"Am I on speaker?"

"Yes!" Jack and Ryan yelled simultaneously. I laugh loudly and huffed.

"You're a jerk, Matt!" I said playfully. "I just was gonna ask how long my character's hair should be."

"That's not even important! Just give her a ponytail." Jeremy mutters. I whine.

"But ponytails are so gross."

"Ryan, buddy, I'm sorry for you." Matt says, laughing. Ryan sighs and I huff again.

"I hate you guys... No one else is here that cares to talk to me!"

"Fine, fine, sorry..." Jack says, sighing. "What if you give her long hair that hung over one shoulder?"

"What, like the Mystery Girl from Steven Universe?" There's a pause.

"The what from what?" I stay quiet and shake my head.

"Uh, never mind. Thanks!" I hang up quickly and turn back to my computer. Maybe now I won't forget anything.

 

 

A/N: Sorry this chapter was so short! It's just a filler. Sorry guys. Love you and thank you so much for the views and stars! It means a lot.

-Beth

 


	16. Sixteen

My character had been all straightened out and drawn, to the point of which I was proud of it. In fact it was on the screen right now in my animation setting, rolling it's eyes at Max, who was getting annoyed. I smirked at the image until a knock came to my door.

"Yeah?"

"Can I see it yet?" Michael whined, pushing open the door. I sighed and shrugged.

"I guess..." He rushes over and takes a seat by my desk. I rewind the animation and play it for Michael to witness from start to finish. My ginger character was arriving with a backpack with Mr. Campbell beside her. The plot twist was that out of all the crazy sex times the camp owner has been through in his different wild adventures, one of the moms finally shoved their kid on him and now, while he's trying to escape from the law, he drops her off as a babysitting experience. Max was picking on David and yelling at Mr. Campbell as he left, probably something about the unfairness at the camp. When the older man leaves, my character, Ann, goes over to Max and David and starts picking on him, too.

"We are gonna be best friends?" Michael asks, excited. I nod my head and smile wide.

"Miles suggested it and so did Lindsay." I tell him with the same excitement he had. It was nice Michael and I got to bond over such a fun thing. Especially since people say we don't bond enough. Gavin and I bonded through Meg mainly, Geoff and I through tattoos, Jack and I through funny fan art, Ryan and I- well that's obvious, and Jeremy and I bonded through just our personalities. Michael and I haven't truly had a chance to bond over anything so Camp Camp was going to help us.

The lights turn off to my office and I take a deep breath before locking the door behind me. I turned the corner and was expectant of Ryan to be waiting for me like usually, but he wasn't anywhere in the hallway.

"Ryan?" I walk over to the door to the office and lean my ear on it. I couldn't hear anyone for about ten seconds so I figured no one was in there. I shrugged and went towards the bathroom. Miles was walking out of the men's so I quickly stopped him. "Hey, is Ryan in there?" Miles shakes his head with a small shrug.

"I didn't see him." Luna walks away from me and I finally go to the point of calling Ryan. After four rings, it sends me to voicemail. I get anxious and call Jack. Maybe he's with him.

"Hello?"

"Jack, hey, is Ryan with you?" There's a long pause.

"He didn't tell you?" My heart drops. "Um, well, uh... Ryan is meeting up with Laurie." Him not picking up the phone suddenly became harder for me.

"Like to get back together?" My voice cracked mid-sentence and I know Jack heard it.

"He doesn't know yet." Was I nothing to him? Was I just a spot filler until Laurie changed her mind? "Please just try to stay calm until Ryan tells you what's up. He probably didn't tell you so that you wouldn't freak out." I nodded and knew Jack was right. I needed to be an adult about this. I thank Jack and we hang up the phone. I head out as the sun is setting and slide into my vehicle. What if he chooses to ditch me? No. I can't think about it. Ryan hasn't told me anything about what's happening. I can't jump to conclusions. That will ruin this relationship most likely and I can't afford to do that. It's such a great thing we have... I drive down my street now and try to focus on the road. Maybe Ryan and her are just discussing why she left; Maybe it's closure. I pull into the apartment lot and step out of the car. Ryan wouldn't leave me over closure, right?

"Drop the bag and put your hands up." A voice says simultaneously with a cold object to my neck. I hold my breath and do as told quickly. Am I getting robbed? "You had the cops called on me?" The voice was cracking and it was a female character. I furrowed my eyebrows.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't call the cops on anyone!"

"You expect me to believe Ryan called the cops on me after you showed him my letter?" That's when I knew who it was. "Ryan would never do anything to hurt me. He told me that, you know. And I'm sure he's told you, too." The cold feeling leaves my skin and I turn to face the culprit. It was her: Hannah.

"What do you want from me?"

"I want you out of his life! You ruined every shot I had with him. You. Burnie fired me so he could hire you."

"You stalked Ryan!" When I remembered that she had a gun, I lowered my voice again. This girl was mentally insane. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I slowly reached down for it, but her gun flung up to my face again. "It's just my phone. I won't answer it if you don't want me to but you can shoot me if I say what's happening." Hannah seemed skeptical but I'm pretty sure the chance for her to shoot me was thrilling to her. I saw it was Michael and I answered it slowly. I gotta be smart and quick.

"Hello?"

"Woah, formal? What happened to the angry answering?" He asks, laughing.

"Now isn't the time for it."

"Shit, you want me to call back?"

"Nah, it's fine. I'm not busy. Just stuck on a project." The gun shimmied in Hannah's hands. That's when I knew I had to get a move on. "Alright." I pull the phone away and lock it, but don't hang up. "There, I didn't tell them what's up. You happy?" Hannah sighs and shrugs.

"I don't know if I can trust you. I should just shoot you so I can get you out of the picture."

"Woah, what? We had a deal, Hannah!" I yell, annoyed. "You don't shoot me if I don't spill the beans!"

"Well I could shoot you right here in front of your own home and make it look like a robbery."

"Oh yeah, because robberies definitely happen at this apartment building. You'd be the first, love." God I hope Michael got the point. My heart was pounding and I was pushing my luck. Finally, after three more long minutes of arguing about whether to shoot me or not, I hear sirens wailing and coming onto the lot.

"Lower your weapon!" An officer yells loudly. Out of fear, Hannah shoots and I scream out at the noise, but am surprisingly unhurt. The ground was struck beside my foot but not my body. Thank God... Hannah took off and I ran after her in adrenaline, diving on her and holding her to the ground while cops rushed to us.

"Let me go you dumb bitch!" She cried out frantically. "I'm too young for jail! I can't be in jail."

"You deserve a fucking mental home!" I scream. I was about to punch her but the cops pulled me off and I finally realized what had happened. I was held at gun point by Ryan's stalker, I talked her, I almost got shot, and Ryan is meeting up with his ex-wife. I stayed in place for the cops to ask me questions and I told them everything I could recall or think of about Hannah. I even gave them one of my letters I got from her. They kept it as evidence and I watched them drive off with crazy Hannah in the back of a patrol car. I grabbed my cell and called Michael again.

"Oh my god are you okay?" He immediately asks.

"Is she okay?" I hear Lindsay yell, voice coming gradually closer to the phone. I smile and nod.

"I'm okay. I was being held at gunpoint by Hannah."

"As in ex-pro artist?"

"Yeah. Also Ryan's stalker." Michael let's out a long breath.

"Don't do that shit to me again!" He yells. "I was holding your fucking life in my hands, Samantha!"

"Yes and I'm glad you fucking got the hint she was ready to shoot me!" I laugh out nervously. "It was like something you'd see in a movie. God I'm glad it worked..."

"Yeah, me too." My phone beeps and I look to see Ryan trying to call. I had no idea what to say to him right now. I ignored it.

"Hey, Mikey?" He hums through the phone. "Can you call Ryan? I don't want to talk to him right now." He was quiet for a moment and sighed lightly.

"Alright. See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah." I hang up the phone and head towards my apartment.

I woke up to different texts and calls from Ryan. Well, ignored texts and calls. I knew he was trying to talk to me but I wasn't up for it. I just wasn't. I was angry at him and I was shaken up from last night. I got to work and completely ignored every look from anyone other than Michael and Lindsay. Once I was safe in my office, I locked my door and started to use the peep-hole to choose who would enter or who would talk to me through the door. Michael checked up on me two times and Lindsay five or six, I don't know exactly. Burnie wanted to ask me about work assignments, and Miles wanted to know about Camp Camp. Ryan tried to get me to open the door a few times but I couldn't do it. I just couldn't. There was another knock at the door and I saw it was Jack. I opened the door and he pushed his way in. I locked the door behind him and turned to face him. He looked so irritated.

"What did I tell you?" He asks angrily. "I told you to wait for Ryan to tell you what happened and now you're just acting like a pouty five year old." I frowned and hung my head. "I knew you were strong minded and you could handle any situation given, but right now you proved me wrong. You're acting like a child or a preteen! Talk to Ryan and get this shit settled out. Work comes before the relationship, but when the relationship is shit so is the work." I've never seen Jack angry. It was honestly scary. I felt so small when he did it. "Now I'm gonna send Ryan in here and you guys are either gonna kiss and make-up or fight and break-up. That's up to you." With that, he unlocks the door and exits. I just stand there with my back facing the door. Jack was right. I need to hear it from him. Especially because this is eating me up inside. After five minutes there's three heavy knocks on the door before I don't say anything and open it. I refuse to look at him. I can't. I'm afraid I'll see all the pain and worry I caused. Maybe he will see the same in me... I should have answered his calls and urgent messages.

"Sit." His voice was stern and I nodded, taking a seat at my desk. He goes to the set of chairs in front of my table and takes a seat in one. "Do you want me to tell you about what happened with Laurie? Because I know Jack told you." He sounded annoyed. I don't blame him... I nod at his question. "Laurie asked to meet up and just talk. I agreed and we met up yesterday at two. I thought I'd be back in time to pick you up but the conversation lasted longer than planned. She pretty much gave me closure for the whole leaving ordeal and offered me something amazing. I get to see my kids, Sam..." I smiled at that and looked up at him. He looked like a fucking mess. That was because of me...

"That's great, Ryan." I said sincerely. "That's really awesome." He sighs and leans onto the desk.

"I don't like that you ignored me, Cross."

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't stop thinking about it." Ryan sighs and nods, looking at his hands on the desk. I did the same, watching him twirl his thumbs and rub his fingers against each other.

"I love you." He says softly. I smile gently and nod my head.

"I love you, too." I pause and look him in the eye. "I thought you were gonna go back to her."

"Why would I go back to her when I have you?" The line was cheesy and I couldn't help but fall in love with it. It was like I was reading some kind of book about us and I couldn't help but want to read that part over and over.

"Yeah, but what's so great about someone you've dated for nearly three months compared to someone you've been with for years?" Ryan sighs and smirks slightly.

"Let me tell you something Laurie told me. She said that she's happy I've moved on. It wasn't easy and it wasn't quick, but yet it was a nice and smooth ride. I felt completely comfortable with you after only a week of being around you. You felt the same and it was obvious. She told me that she moved on, too. That she found someone she felt alive with. That's the moment I realized that's what I felt with you. What Laurie and I had- we were limited on so much. We may have been in love, but love and compatibility aren't the same. What we have is both. What Laurie and Wayne have is both. I have never been happier to hear that my ex has moved on. Because that means I had every right to do so, too. I'm so happy it was with you." I smile and laugh lightly.

"You're so cute it's amazing." I glance at the date and then look back at Ryan. "You know, if you're still looking for a roommate, my lease is up in a week." He smirks and nods, laughing lightly.

"I'll make room for your things."


	17. Seventeen

"We're actually doing this..." I whisper. "Is it too early? I feel like it's too early." I was so nervous, but Ryan was happy.

"I don't think so... I mean, you could renew your lease at that crappy apartment or you can come live in this nice house as my roommate. That way when you're comfortable enough with living with me we can say we are living together instead of just roommates." I shrug and nod.

"That sounds like a deal." I sit on the couch with Ryan and smile at him.

"What are you smiling at?" I shrug and lay my head on his shoulder.

"I'm just excited." He clears his throat and laughs lightly.

"Well I hope you stay that way because uh... Laurie wants me to try and take the kids this weekend." My heart skips and I sit up straight.

"What if they don't like me? Oh god... I'm gonna be a horrible person and they are gonna hate me."

"Woah, Sam, it's okay, calm down." He says with a small chuckle. "Eli and Olivia will love you, alright?" I take a deep breath and shake my head.

"Babies like me but not toddlers."

"Do toddlers actually like anyone?" I laugh at that and shake my head.

"I guess not."

"So is it okay if I see them this weekend?"

"Ryan, I don't care. Just know if they hate me I might cry." He nods his head and kisses my nose, making me scrunch up my face. Suddenly my phone rings and I groan. It just has to ruin this moment. I grab it and answer it.

"Hello?"

"Samantha Lloyd Cross!" I sit straight up when I hear Kara's voice.

"Y-yes?" I ask, confused.

"This shit is serious... You can't be sending in cartoons all the time. We need actual designs." I furrow my brow.

"What are you talking about? I didn't send in cartoons. I haven't for a few weeks, actually." There's a long pause.

"Oops."

"Kara..." I trail. "What did you do?"

"I uh... Hey you mind coming to the office and drawing up a few designs?" I throw my head back and look at the clock.

"Kara, it's seven at night!"

"Come on, just a few that I can send in?" I stand from the couch with an annoyed sigh.

"You owe me." I hang up the phone and grab my jacket, slinging it on my arms.

"Where are you going?" Ryan questions, standing with me. "What did Kara do?"

"I'm guessing she deleted my designs and noticed it too late so now I gotta hurry up and go back to the office, draw up a few since my files are corrupted and then send them in."

"Well I can drive you?" He offers. I shake my head and grab my keys from the coffee table.

"I don't know how late I'll be and I don't want you to risk driving home tired." I mention. He nods his head in understanding and I lean up, kissing him before heading towards the door. "I'll try to hurry."

 

It took four hours, but I finally sent Kara four designs. They were all based on animations coming out this summer. Such as Camp Camp and RWBY Chibi, and even Red vs. Blue. I lock my office door again and Kara yawns, looking exhausted.

"Oh my god, thank you so much, Sam." I roll my eyes, tired as hell and not wanting to deal with this anymore.

"I expect money or six coffees on my desk Monday morning." I wave her off and walk towards the office door. I walk out of the building and go to my car, seeing Ryan leaning against it, though, scared the hell out of me. "I told you not to drive here, Babe..."

"I didn't." He says, pointing to the bus stop across the street. "I came about thirty minutes ago. It was the last bus of the night. Think you could take me home?" I smile at his wits and nod, unlocking my car. He goes to the driver's side, though, and takes my keys, slipping in and shutting the door in my face. I stood there, trying to realize what had happened and why. I was extremely tired and I'm sure it showed in my expressions. I slipped into the car and he waits for me to buckle up. When I do he backs out and drives towards the house. "So tomorrow the kids will need picked up around ten. Think you'll be ready in eleven hours?" I throw my head back and close my eyes.

"If I sleep from now until nine fifty-nine, I'm sure I will." He chuckles and I feel his hand land on my knee. "I love you." I whisper. I was sure he didn't hear it, but I smiled when I knew he did.

"I love you, too."

 

The next day came quicker than I had planned. We get the kids here in about five minutes and I'm nervous as shit.

"Oh my god they are gonna think it's so weird we are living together. They are gonna ask awkward questions!" I say, rambling on about my fear of meeting his children. He sighs in annoyance and shakes his head.

"Sam! I told you that you needed to calm down!" He hasn't stopped hearing my stressing since yesterday and I knew it was annoying but I couldn't stop.

"I'm sorry!" I yell at him with a tight frown. "I just-"

"Daddy!" My ears perk up and my heart stops when a child's voice calls out. I look up and see two blonde kids running towards Ryan. A blonde woman also stands behind them by the van. This was it. The big meet up. I take a deep breath and smile at the children and what I have assumed is Laurie.

"Olivia, Eli!" Immediately, Ryan takes them into his arms and I see his eyes glossing over. I walk over to Laurie and extend my hand to her.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Samantha Cross. Please, feel fine with calling me Sam." She smiles and takes my hand with a firm shake.

"Well I'm Laurie. So you're the woman making Ryan happy?" I shrug and tuck a hair behind my ear, face heating up and heart pounding. God this is awkward...

"I guess so. If that's what he's calling it." We share a laugh and I look back at Ryan and his kids. They were all three so happy. "Thank you for doing this, Laurie." I turn back to her with a soft smile. "I don't think you understand just how excited he was for this." She sighs and nods, suddenly looking guilty.

"I know... I'm an awful mother. I thought it would save them heartbreak." I shake my head at her.

"No, no. You're a great person, I'm sure of it, and from what Ryan has told me about you, you worked hard to keep Ryan _and_ the kids happy as could be." I wasn't going to lie to Laurie. She did up and leave Ryan, but it was pushed past to show the kids were important. They weren't going to try and mend things romantically but family wise. No matter how bad they didn't want to admit it, they needed to push past differences for their kids to be happy.

"Thank you, Sam. I'm happy to see someone so kind has been caring for him." I knew she still loved Ryan. It was obvious. Her attitude towards him wasn't hatred like most exes. She cared for him and wanted him to be happy. It was hard not to love him after how long they had been together. "Well I have a meeting to go to in and hour and a half. It'll be an hour once I get home. I better get going." I nod my head.

"Again, nice meeting you, Laurie. Take care!"

"You too! And please remind Ryan that they go to bed at nine now instead of eight!" I nod my head and wave her off as she enters the van's drivers seat. I go over to Ryan and the kids with a smile on my face.

"Who's she?" Eli questions, smiling at me with Olivia giving her brother an open mouth grin.

"She's my girlfriend." Ryan answers with a small smile.

"You have a girlfriend like Mommy has a boyfriend?" He nods and Olivia giggles.

"Daddy, I like her hair. I want her hair color."

"I thought you wanted purple!" He tells her. Eli and Olivia grip onto his hands and jeans, scared of letting go.

"That was last year, Dad!" Eli explains to him. I smile at their conversation and look up at Ryan, wondering if it was an okay to talk to them. He gives a small nod and I look back at the bright-eyed children.

"Hey guys, I'm Sam." I say with a small wave.

"Hi, Sam." They say in unison. Olivia looks up at me with her backpack strap slipping and I carefully fix it to be on her shoulder.

"You guys ready to go to Daddy's?" They nod their heads quickly and begin to run off to the truck. I watch them with Ryan and he shrugs.

"I didn't think you did that bad."

"Yeah for now."

"Remember, Eli is a bit cranky when he doesn't get what he wants and Olivia is learning from him." He whispers.

"Oh, Laurie said their bedtimes-"

"Are at nine instead of eight, yeah I remember." I smile and kiss his cheek while he wraps an arm around my shoulders. The kids wait patiently at the truck and Ryan unlocks the door, Eli climbing in and me helping in Olivia. They both take their seats and I turn to them, smiling small.

"Buckle up." I command. They nod and do as told, looking out at the Austin streets. Ryan winks at me and I shrug, looking out at the city also.

"Where did you and Sam meet?" Eli questions. We haven't even started driving yet and he questions are already happening.

"We met through Daddy's and my job." I explain.

"Do you like him?" Olivia strikes up.

"Of course she does, Livi!" Eli scolds. "They are together just like Mommy and Robbie!" Ryan smirks and nods, looking in the rear view before turning his eyes back to the road.

"Yes, Sam must really really like me." He answers.

"Do you like her?" Olivia asks in a return. I arch an eyebrow and Ryan shrugs.

"She's alright." This makes the kids giggle and me fake a hurt gasp. "No no, I really really like her."

"Are you guys gonna get married?" Eli perks up. Ryan laughs awkwardly while I stay quiet. Marriage isn't something we talked about yet probably because four months isn't much time.

"Well, we don't know. It takes a lot to get married. We don't know if we are ready." I answer.

"But you guys really really like each other right?"

"Yes."

"So you get married!"

"Eli, baby, that's not how it works." When I realized I had a pet name used on him I felt awkward. What if he doesn't react well?

"Then when do you get married?" He seemed generally confused on the subject.

"After a few years maybe." Ryan answers this time.

"But Mommy and Robbie got married and it's only been six months." Olivia tells us. I look at Ryan immediately to look for any reaction. Thankfully, he didn't seem too stunned by it. I grab his thigh and he smiles, releasing one hand from the wheel and grabbing mine to hold it. These kids were smart with their words and it's obvious they were smart in general.

"Well we haven't even been dating for six months. So Mommy wins." Ryan says, making the kids giggle again. By the pained expression he tried to mask, though, Ryan wasn't happy. He was annoyed and frustrated with Laurie and Robbie. Then again, he shouldn't be. He moved on just as fast.


	18. Eighteen

The weekend flew by with the kids. Olivia was apparently "absolutely in love" with me, as Ryan put it. Eli and Ryan bonded most of the time because Miles needed me a few times over the two days they spent with us and Olivia was more focused on watching me do my make-up. She was very easily entertained and it was fun to have her here. Eli said make-up was like face paint and Ryan agreed the whole time. Whenever Eli and I did get to bond it was over games. Whether it was board games or video games, Ryan spoiled him to them. We spent most of Sunday morning playing Chutes and Ladders and Candyland. We dropped them off with Laurie about an hour ago. Now, on this Monday morning, Michael was sitting in my office and playing with the little Samurai sword that was counted as a letter opener that I got in a grab bag from a mini-con a while back.

"So how's living with boo?" He asks while balancing the fake blade on his fingertip but failing each time.

"It's nice honestly. I mean, it's only been five days, but still." He smiles and leans back in his chair.

"Did you hear about that one girl... Hannah?" I arch an eyebrow. I forgot about her. Once she was shackled and away from me I pushed everything about her from my head to focus on better things. Now that horrible night flies back into my mind.

"What about her?"

"She's got twenty-five to life for murder, stalking, robbery, concealed weapon without a permit, and some other bullshit. She killed someone, Sam." He says with slight worry. "That could have been you." I nodded and continued to type the email I was focused on. "What did Ryan say about it, by the way?" I try to think back to what Ryan said about the events he missed but quickly realized I never told him. He was busy with Laurie and I avoided the fact she held me at gun point. He called that night but I didn't answer. Same with the next morning. Once I got to work I didn't talk to anyone about it because work was my only view.

"He doesn't know."

"What?" Michael places the little sword on the desk again in its plastic sheath before looking at me with disbelief. "Why the fuck not? He's your boyfriend, Samantha." Usually when Michael uses my full name he is upset or worried. Right now he was both. He was probably worried for why I didn't tell Ryan about Hannah and then upset that I didn't tell him at all.

"Because I honestly forgot about it!" I defend. "What makes you think I want to remember something like that or even discuss it?" He's quiet. "Besides, if I tell him now there's gonna be a big argument on why I didn't tell him..."

"There's gonna be a bigger one if you tell him farther down the road." He had a point. I hate when Michael is right... I sigh and rub my face as I hit send on my email.

"Fine..." I mutter. "I hate you."

"No you don't." He smirks and stands from my desk. "My lunch is over. Thanks for bringing that grilled cheese for me, Loser." I laugh lightly and nod.

"No problem, Dork." He walks out of my office and I stare at the computer. I was slightly swamped with work and it wasn't making the day any easier. Kara, Barb, Miles, Burnie, Trevor, and Lindsay all helped me with the different types of work I had. Kara for sales, Miles for production, Lindsay for comics, and Burnie with meetings and how they will work with my schedule. Barb... She was here to keep my company and stop me from ripping people's heads off. I glanced at the clock and saw I had three hours left until supposed-to-be clock out time. I always ended up staying later than usual due to now being more than production artist. Burnie was talking to me about moving up to sales management with Chris. I was excited for that but I was losing my production artist job for that promotion. This position is what I applied for. I'd make about fifty cents more an hour with the promotion but is it worth it? Maybe I'll think about it before the meeting Wednesday. That meeting is the moment of truth where I say whether or not I'd like to accept the offer. I sighed lightly and continued to look through my computer. So many drawings... All of them were either used for something or sold on merchandise. I was happy. I couldn't have been more happy in my life to see my stuff on the sales floor or even in videos on the Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter YouTube pages. I was usually doing animations or fixing the way RWBY's characters moved. Would the job really be worth moving for?

-

"Why the fuck couldn't you have told me?" Ryan shouts, us having a slight yelling match in the parking lot. I told him about Hannah and I guessed correctly about him and I getting into it. People leaving the building were staring at us with caution and I couldn't help but feel embarrassed.

"Can we not do this here?"

"Well if you were so sure about how I'd react you should have waited until we got home!" I winced at his raised voice and shook my head. The truck was parked not too far from me and whether Ryan was going to ride in that truck with me was what would send this argument through the roof. I walked towards it and I didn't hear Ryan following me. I spun on my heels to see he wasn't.

"I'll be at home. You know, where we can talk like adults and not like a bickering teenage couple!" I bellowed at him with a deepened brow and crinkled nose of disgust for the moment we were in. I'm sure he wanted to yell something back but I didn't give him the time or chance. I hopped into the drivers' seat. I waited a good ten to fifteen seconds while looking into the rear view to see if he'd make a move for the truck. He just glared at the back windshield and I huffed, backing out and getting onto the road. When I make it home, I'm still pissed. He didn't want to talk about this at home. No. He wanted to yell about it in the parking lot at work in front of all our friends/coworkers. It was starting to rain out and my stomach suddenly flipped with guilt. What if he has to get home in the rain and something happens or it makes this worse? My stomach flipped again and I shook my head. He could have chose to ride with me. That's his own fault. I walk from the door and to the kitchen to make something to eat. I muttered profanities when I break the handle to one of the pans I brought from my apartment. I toss it onto the counter, not wanting to deal with it right now. I use another pan that thankfully wasn't old and ruined like mine was. I grab some pancake mix and begin to grease the pan. The whole time I'm cooking the rain picks up and is harder than when I first saw it starting to drizzle. There was thunder and wind that howled against the door and windows. Worry hit my gut and I bit my lip. Maybe I should call or check on Ryan. I continue to cook until I have three pancakes for myself ready. I stare at the plate and sigh, knowing I'm going to feel bad if I don't make Ryan any. He's probably just as hungry and irritated as me. I continue to cook until three more golden pancakes form onto the plate I laid out beside mine. I turn off the stove and as soon as I place the utensils in the sink the front door opens. I glance to it and see Ryan not soaked at all and I let out a small sigh of relief.

"Glad you're okay..." I whisper more to myself than him. He clears his throat and nods.

"Yeah, I'm okay." His voice was different than when we fought in the parking lot. "I'm sorry I yelled in front of work." He said softly. I nod and look at him with less annoyance than what I had before.

"I forgive you." Our words were so quiet I'm surprised we heard each other. I grab both of our plates and go to the dining room table. I set his down across from mine and go back to the cabinet for the syrup. When I turn back around Ryan is staring at me with a tiny smile. "What?" I question. He shrugs and walks towards the table with me.

"Even when you're mad at me you still make me food." I roll my eyes and giggle, sitting down.

"Shut up and eat." He takes his seat and everything is surrounded by a comfortable silence until I decide to speak up. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Hannah." He puts down his fork with a small shake of his head.

"No, no... I just got upset because you could have been hurt." He explains. "I love you, Sam..." His words fluttered my heart to go deeper into my chest before it explodes.

"I love you, too." He smiles soft at me.

"Michael gave me a ride home. He told me why you didn't tell me and while I think it's stupid, it's correct. You pushed it off and put what was happening in front of you. You like to live in the moment." I nod. "I'm sorry for how I reacted." I shake my head and reach over the table to grab his hand. I give it a small squeeze with a light smile.

"It's okay." I whisper. The thunder rolls with a crack of lightning and it makes me jump.

"Kind of ruined the moment." Ryan chuckles out. I nod in agreement. "I say after we eat we binge watch Scooby-Doo while drinking hot chocolate. Yeah?" I nod again and he smiles before taking a bite of his food.

"I love you." I tell him again. This time, my words were changed to be something deeper. Something more meaningful and with less excited glee and more relaxed happiness. He looks at me straight in the eyes.

"I love you, too." His tone matched my own and it almost sent a shiver down my spine. Ryan loves me and I love him.


	19. Nineteen

The power outage at work today has been nothing but a pain in the ass for everyone. I was supposed to star in a Let's Play for WWE, but the outage ruined that. Also, I was able to get absolutely no work done. I couldn't even draw in my sketchbook because I couldn't see properly. You'd expect us to have generators by now since the rolling blackouts happen a lot with such a wide use of electricity throughout the company.

"Hey." I turn at Ryan's voice and see him leaning on the doorway to my office- which over the past three days has sometime in between become also become Chris' office. That's right, I took the job. I still was uneasy about the promotion, but Ryan encouraged it. I thought I might as well try it.

"Yeah?" I ask him.

"Let's go home. It's getting pretty bad out there." I look over my shoulder and see the rain covering my window to disorient the view outside. I turn back to Ryan.

"But work-"

"Babe, we can't get anything done until the power kicks back on." He points out. "Come on." He gets off the doorway and grabs my coat and purse from the hook. I rub my temples before sniffling. "You also should have stayed home anyways."

"It's just a small cold. I'll be fine." I comment. Instead of arguing with me he just nods and waits for me to gather my phone and keys. I take my jacket from him with a 'thank you' and then my purse. I make sure the switch is off and Ryan shuts the door behind us. I use my keys to lock it and sniffle again, wiping at my nose with my sleeve. It was gross but it worked.

"When we get home I'll make you soup and tea, okay?" I nod, not bothering to decline. I was sick. I'm not gonna lie or not let him take care of me. I know he wants to. He's been trying since I got sick yesterday. We walk towards the front door when we are stopped by Ashley and Burnie.

"Hey, so uh... You guys need to stay in until the storm calms. We don't want anyone going home in weather like this." I look at Ryan, who glances at me and then to Ashley and Burnie.

"So what do we do until then?"

"I guess just whatever the fuck you can." Ashley replies with a small shrug. "Once we give the okay you guys can leave." I nod and tug on Ryan's arm.

"Come on, we can go to the book room." I mention. He nods and thanks Ashley and Burnie for the concern of their employees. We walk to the book room where also sat Jon, Gavin, Meg, and Gus.

"I'm just saying that Zelda should really stop acting so high and mighty." Gus says.

"She's a fucking princess, Gus!" Meg defends.

"She's also full of herself." I input. They look at us and I give a small wave before hugging myself in my over-sized leather jacket.

"Hey, guys! Waiting it out, too?" Jon asks, smiling at us. I nod and take a seat beside Meg, looking at her belly and smiling softly at it.

"Yeah." Ryan replies. "Request of the Burns." They nod and continue their conversation of Zelda and Link. Ryan nudges me with his elbow and I turn to him. "Why'd you come here?" He questions. I shrug and glance at the bookcase.

"I kind of wanted to read." I whisper. "It's okay. They are having a conversation. I'll just sit here." I ignored the difficult stare Ryan gave me by turning back to the small group. Gavin was going on about a different topic now and how a fortnight is a popular speech phrase in England yet Gus found it annoying and stupid. I smirked at the conversation and was laughing at something the Brit then felt offended by slightly when Ryan nudges me again. When I look at him, though, he has a book by his face.

"This is a good novel." He's holding up 'Kind of a Funny Story'. I shake my head.

"Sweetie, it's okay-"

"Just read." He hands the book to me and I am hesitant to take it. I do nonetheless and thank him.

-

The storm didn't calm even in the slightest and finally Burnie and Ashley had to risk it and let everyone leave. We made it home around seven-thirty and I was absolutely exhausted. My cold was a bigger cold than I thought, I had no sleep last night, I was hungry, and I was now getting a vomiting feeling. Ryan was in the kitchen making me soup while I curled up on the couch in a blanket, sweating furiously. My head was stuffy and it was numbing my headache but making me feel dumb and fuzzy. My shoulders shake and I open my eyes with a squint while looking at Ryan with soup in one hand and a tea cup in the other.

"You look even worse..." He says softly. I sit up as he places the dishes on the table in front of the couch. His cold hands touch my forehead and I let out a small hiss from the sudden temperature change. "You're burning up. Hold on." He walks away while I make myself comfortable for eating and drinking my tea. In a few seconds he returns with a dalmatian designed thermometer in hand. I know the drill and lift up my tongue for him to place the stick item under it. I close my mouth around it and close my eyes, leaning back against the couch. The device beeps and Ryan removes it. "Alright, I'll get you some Aleve. You're at one-o-three." I frown and sit up again.

"I don't like being sick."

"Well hopefully you won't be for long." He leans down and kisses my forehead while I grab my tea and softly blow on it.

"Thank you for taking care of me." I tell him with a groggy and weak voice. The power flickered with a deep roll of thunder and I jump, splashing some of the tea on me. I frown again and he sighs.

"I just hope the power doesn't go out here, too." I nod in agreement. After an hour of eating soup, taking an Aleve, and drinking my tea, I am trying to fight myself to keep my eyes open. Ryan ushered me to bed and as soon as I hit the mattress I couldn't sleep. I was more comfortable on the couch.

"Can I sleep on the couch?" I whisper. Ryan sighs and shakes his head.

"You won't sleep well."

"I won't sleep well anywhere but I'll be more comfortable." I comment. He looks like he thinks about it but shakes his head.

"I have a better idea." He gets up from the bed and disappears for a moment. I hear the door to the closet down the hall open and I was now curious as to what he was doing. He doesn't come back for quite some time. When he does he returns empty-handed. I don't have time to ask questions before I'm being scooped up from the bed. I don't bother asking anything and just let him carry me to the living room. On the floor I see two sleeping bags spread onto the carpet, the table moved, and the couch pushed back for more room. On the sleeping bags were two fresh and clean pillows and a big comforter.

"What's this?" I finally ask.

"It's our bed for the night. The floor will help your back and breathing." I nod and take the to makeshift bed. Ryan lays beside me and holds me close to his chest while I focus on breathing and trying to sleep. Ryan tossed slightly and it was obvious he was uncomfortable.

"Babe, go back to the bed if you're not comfortable."

"No." He insists softly. "I'll be fine. Just go to sleep." I don't argue with him anymore since my body relaxes and my eyes close fully.

-

Ryan was still passed out when I woke up. The sky was dark with clouds but it was obviously morning. I look at the time on the wall clock and see it reading seven. I grab Ryan and shake him softly.

"We're gonna be late." My voice was harsh and almost gone. Ryan opens his eyes and looks around. It was as if he forgot where he was for a moment. His eyes fall on me and he smiles lightly.

"You look better."

"I still have a cold but yes I feel better." I tell him before sitting up fully. "Come on, we're gonna be late and we have a lot of work to do." I try to stand but Ryan pulls me down.

"Let's call off and just sleep all day." Now that I actually listen, I hear a deeper mucus sound in his words.

"Shit, you're getting sick!" I say, frowning. "Ryan-"

"Sh..." He trails with his arms around my waist. "Sleep." I roll my eyes and unlatch him from me.

"Come on you idiot. Let me go. You need rest all day but I can go to work." His arms stay around me and his nose nuzzles my hips and ass.

"No, don't leave." He whines.

"You make it hard to."

"Good. Stay."

"Ryan..." I sigh and he looks at me with his beautiful blue eyes. My heart stops and I think about if I'll ever get used to his beauty. "I love you, you idiot." He smiles and kisses my hips.

"I love you, too." He sits up now but keeps one arm around me loosely. "Do we really have to go?" He complains.

"I do, but you can afford to stay home and take care of yourself."

"I don't wanna be alone, though." I roll my eyes and lean over, kissing him lightly. I immediately regret it.

"I'm gonna make you more sick! God I'm stupid."

"Hey, no you aren't." He turns me to face him. When he goes in for another kiss I pull back.

"No, I don't need you even more sick."

"Don't worry about me. Give me a kiss." He tries again and I giggle, pulling from him once more.

"Stop!" I say through my fit of laughter. He makes kissing noises as he continues to try and land one on me. I attempted to squirm from him but I fail and his lips press against my exposed neck. I swat at him but he trails kisses all over my neck. "Ryan, stop." I say with less laughter now. "Seriously, you're gonna get sick."

"Did you know sex is a good exercise?"

"What are you getting at, Haywood?"

"Exercise is good to help rid the sickness." He comments. I arch an eyebrow.

"Is that so?"

"Yep."

"And why should I do that?"

"Because you love me and want me to feel better." I laugh lightly and kiss his forehead.

"I suppose I do..." I trail teasingly. "Maybe I'll do it." He smirks and kisses me on the neck again. I pull back with the same laughter. "I said maybe!" He whines in disapproval and I shrug. "I guess so. But we will have to go slow for you to not overwork yourself." He smiles again and I can't help but return it. He was like a little kid sometimes. Of course, that's not a good thing to call him when we're about to have sex... His lips find their way up from my neck to my lips and heavily move with mine. My arms slip around his neck and I hold him closer to me. My legs wrap around his waist. His hands attach to my hips and I don't break the kiss while y hands run slowly down his chest. For a moment, just for a quick moment, my heart pings under his touch. I stop the kiss and smile small, looking him in the eyes. His pupils dilated and all I could think of was one thing.

"You make me so happy." Instead of me saying it, Ryan did. It was as if we had the same train of thought.

"You make me so happy, too." He returns the happy gesture and we return to our task at hand.


	20. Twenty

I stared at Ryan with my arms crossed, his face and my own red. His jaw was tight and I couldn't help but be angry at it.

"Are we gonna settle this or not?" He asks loudly. I roll my eyes.

"I already told you my answer. I'm going."

"Why?" He was infuriated now.

"Because I feel like I need to!" I shout. He goes quiet again. "I'm sorry..." I sigh. "I just need to." His head hangs and he doesn't look back up.

"Do we mean nothing to you?" He questions lowly. I furrow my eyebrows.

"You mean everything to me and so does this relationship. I just- I have to." There's a pause between us. "This is just like when you went to see Laurie. Please..." He avoids my pleading looks and I sigh. "I don't love him anymore. At one point in time I did. Please, Ryan." He shoots his eyes everywhere but to me.

"Okay." His voice was just above a whisper. "Okay, I trust you." I smile small and walk to him quietly. He still evades my eyes when I reach him.

"I love you." I whisper. This time his eyes meet mine. They stared deep into me and I could feel the heat radiating from his body from how worked up he got.

"I love you, too." I smile small and lean up, tapping my lips to his. He accepts the small gesture reluctantly. I hold his hand, my thumb running over his knuckles.

"I'll be leaving for New York in three days, okay?" He nods and I hug tightly to him. "I know this really bugs you but I have to go. It will only take a few days to work everything out, okay?" He nods and I smile lightly. "If you want, you can come." I see his eyes light up as he looks at me.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because I know I'll want you there when everything happens." He smiles small. "But you'll have to stay at the hotel room while I see him, okay?" He frowns for a moment but nods. "If anything happens, I'll call." Again he nods his head. "Now let's go to bed."

"Okay." He kisses my forehead before leading me towards the bedroom. I crawl into bed with Ryan and immediately curl into his side. Instead of the usual arm around me position he is full on hugging me to his chest. I smile, knowing he does this when we fight or argue. It was his way of pretty much telling me to stay. It called me back to Earth every time he did it. I let out a deep breath and thought of what I was even going to do in three days time. I was going to see Adam. He was going to talk to me about our past. Did I want him to? Yes... I think I do. I'm not sure why but I feel like I need to. I suppose I feel like a lot of things went unanswered. I let my head trail off as my body did too into a deep sleep.

-

I leave tonight with Ryan and we were both packed up. When I told Geoff on Monday that we would be going he was skeptical. He claimed he needed Ryan that day but instead of forcing him to stay he had just moved the idea to that day and changed up the whole week. My vacation days were used when I went to see my family so I was running on paid sick days, which was two and a half days. Ryan still had a few vacation days left so he decided to use them.

"You got everything?" Ryan breaks my thoughts with his question and I look to him, smiling small.

"I think so." I reply. "You?" He gives a simple nod and I look at the floor, thinking about this whole mess again.

"Hey..." Ryan calls. I glance to him again. "Stop thinking about this. You're gonna stress yourself out before it even happens." I nod knowing he was right. "Just take a few deep breaths and let it all out." I do as told, my fuzzy head beginning to clear. "Good. Now come and hug me." I roll my eyes and he shrugs. "That always makes you feel better, right?" I ignore the cocky tone he used and stand, going over and hugging him. He laughs which causes my body to rumble with his. There's a long pause before anyone speaks again. "Can I at least meet him?" My heart sunk.

"N-no..." I stutter out. "I don't think that will be a good idea." Ryan frowns.

"Well why not?"

"Because if he says something that sets you off he's gonna find it and use it just to get you riled up." I claim.

"So you think I'm gonna hit him or something?"

"Well you might." He pauses and takes a deep breath.

"Okay so what do I do? Twiddle my thumbs until you get back to the hotel?" His tone was turning annoyed and I knew if I let it this would turn into an argument again.

"No, but I'm saying to please keep your cool." I reply softly. He groans but nods nonetheless. I lean up and place a kiss on his cheek. "I love you." I whisper.

"I love you, too." He returns the low mutter with a small smile. "Now come on, we need to go to the airport."

-

We arrived at the hotel about thirty minutes ago. I was exhausted and the time change had us two hours ahead of Texas so it was only nine there but eleven here. My body shuddered with the lack of sleep and stress before I dropped my luggage and Ryan closed the door behind him. I stood there, rubbing my temples as I thought. This could be the biggest mistake of my life... Suddenly I feel Ryan's lips on my neck and trailing down to the top of my shoulder. I shiver at his touch.

"Relax, Babe..." He whispers onto my skin. I listen to his words and slump my shoulders, touching his face gently with my hand as he nibbles on my shoulder. After a moment he pulls away and spins me to face him. His hands go to my hips and his lips go to mine. It wasn't a sexually tense kiss nor was it a normal kiss. This one had passion and meaning. It had love and faith in it.It made my body warm and my heart melt. We pulled apart slowly and Ryan pulls me into his chest.

"Whatever Adam has to say, just know I love you and I won't let him hurt you again." I smile and hold tighter to him.

"Thank you..." I say lowly. He pulls me back slightly to kiss my forehead before letting go entirely.

"Let's go to sleep. You're gonna need it." I nod and follow him to the bed. We undress and don't bother with pajamas since the body heat and blankets were warm enough. Ryan had brought his own blankets since he hated hotel bedding. I couldn't say I don't agree. My head goes into his chest and his arm goes loose around my waist. I smile and curl up as well as I could without us both being uncomfortable. My eyes shut and a smile stays playing on my face as Ryan's hand makes circles on my hip.

-

"God I hope this isn't gonna end badly..." I whisper to myself as I knock on the address' door. I take a deep breath before a man who looks like Adam but yet different answers the door. "A-Adam?" The man nods and smiles small.

"Hey, Sam." I swallow thickly and smile small back. "Come in, I'm glad you could make it." I do as offered and follow Adam into the house. Anything could happen today. I just want to give it a chance to not be bad.

"So how did you get my number?" I tried to not sound rude at all but I ended up failing. Thankfully he just chuckles.

"Your Aunt Sapphire gave it to me after some haggling." I laugh lowly. At least my family was trying to protect me. "I know that this is uncomfortable for you so I want to make this quick. Any questions you have I can answer and any questions I have I want you to answer. Okay?" I nod and furrow my brows.

"Why didn't we just discuss this over the phone?"

"Because I know you like to fix problems face to face." Of course he'd remember that. We fought enough times for it to be drilled into his head. "Sit, please. Anything to drink?" I shake my head but take my seat.

"So do you mind if I ask questions first? I have a lot on my mind." He shakes his head this time.

"Go ahead. Shoot."

"Okay, why did you suddenly want to fix everything?"

"Not fix but clear the air." He answers, sitting in front of me. "I know that we broke up but within those times we had good times and I didn't want it to end the way it did."

"You hit me."

"Exactly. I didn't want it to end that way." I lowered my head and fiddled with my fingers. "My turn: Why did you leave New York?" I shrugged and rubbed my knuckles.

"I guess because I felt lost here. Stuck maybe... I don't know." He nods and glances at his cup. "Why were you scared of being a father?" He sighed and scratched his neck.

"Because I knew you'd be a great mom but I'd be a terrible dad. I mean, look at how I treated you. I pushed you into getting an abortion." I don't look up to him. "I wouldn't want to teach my kid that's okay."

"Maybe you could have changed for the kid then."

"I was too far gone, Sam." I look up to him.

"You wouldn't have known unless you tried..."

"I'm sorry, but I wasn't okay with that." There's another long silence. "Have you moved on?" I nodded immediately.

"His name's Ryan. I met him through work." Adam sips on his soda and nods.

"That's nice... Does he treat you well?"

"That's two questions."

"Well then you'll get two."

"Yes, he treats me well. Fantastic, actually. It's more than I thought I'd ever be treated." There's a small pause. "Did you move on?"

"I tried. I felt like I did you so dirty that I couldn't." I nodded, not going to lie about how he treated me.

"Do you think after today you will?" He nods quickly.

"I do because it will make me feel like I'm a caring adult instead of a complete asshole." I smile small. "How long have you been dating?"

"It's almost been a year. We both moved on quickly." Adam smiles and nods.

"That's good." His tone wasn't sarcastic or hurt. It was genuinely happy. "I'm glad you are both moved on and happy with each other."

"You know, I'm honestly happy that this is why you called me here. I am content with this conversation." I admit. Adam smiles.

"Me too." He sips his soda as I think of another question.

"Why haven't you left New York?"

"I felt like I would ruin good lives if I moved." I then realized he didn't only fuck up my feelings but his own. Maybe Adam has changed. I know the live I once felt wasn't there romantically but as a person, I did love him at one point. Maybe that's what still lingered.


	21. Twenty-One

Adam and I had a lot of questions for each other and we parted ways easily. There wasn't a friendship we had built and this disconnected our lives from each other. Both of us just needed to discuss the past and move forwards. Thankfully, I was content with everything that had happened. Ryan was of course told everything and he seemed happy with it as well. My main concern was that Adam moved on and found himself confident enough to love another. He was a good person just a little fucked up when we were together. I mean, he did change. He got a good job, went to school when I left, and even had his own beautiful home. I was happy for him as a person to another person.

"You okay?" I snap my head up and look at Chris, whom was playing with his little Gandalf figurine from his desk. I smile small at him and nod.

"I'm pretty content right now, to be honest." I reply. He sighs and smiles.

"Good, because your phone stopped ringing before I got your attention." He says as my eyes widen. "You might wanna tell whoever was calling why you missed their calls."

"Calls?"

"Wow you were really out of it." He says with a small laugh. "They called three times, Sam." I rubbed my face with my hand as my other reached for the phone. As soon as my hand touched it the device rang. I jumped slightly but quickly picked it up and dragged it to my ear.

"Hello?" I ask, trying to act like I didn't just ignore three calls.

"Hey," Ryan's voice came through. "Kara is trying to get a hold of you."

"Of course she answers for you!" I hear Kara scowl in the background and groan inwardly.

"I'm sorry, Kara!" I whimper. "I didn't mean to ignore you!" Ryan repeats my words and I hear a mumbled "bullshit" before Ryan talks again towards me.

"She wanted to tell you that you had a package down at the front desk." I nod and stand from my desk, thanking Ryan and hanging up the phone. Now that I thought of it... Ryan and I have almost been dating for half a year now. Time flies by when you have this job and that man as a boyfriend. I walk from my office and see Ryan talking to Kara at the front desk.

"So where's the package?" I say, making sure I was interrupting them when I spoke.

"Right here." Ryan says with a big smile before kissing my on the forehead. Kara rolls her eyes and fake gags before pulling a box from behind the desk to hands towards me. I arched an eyebrow when I saw it was partially opened and glanced at Ryan. He shrugged and I just kept staring. "Okay, so I got curious... But I didn't open it! So do it, I wanna see what it is." I read the sender and see it's from New York. In fact, from my family in New York. I furrow my brow and set it on the front desk, tearing open the rest of the box's tape. Inside I saw remnants of things my brother made me throughout his years of living with me that I was unable to bring when I moved here. I covered my mouth and pulled out a necklace that had Rainicorn on it from Adventure Time. He stole this from me when he was in his "angsty tween" years. Inside the box along with it was a sand-dollar that was painted purple and white, which were my favorite colors. The last thing that killed me was the last item in the box- My mom and dad's wedding rings. I grasped my heart tightly through my shirt and Ryan eyes me cautiously. Tears were coming to my eyes and I shook my head. I told mom and dad that if something ever happened to them I wanted to use their rings for my own marriage. Ryan stares at the rings in my palm and I can se he is nervous and slightly uncomfortable. Shit, I would be, too. I put them delicately back into the package and wiped my eyes. I smiled softly at my worried friends and thanked them for baring with me. Without another word I walk back to my office where Chris was tapping away on his keyboard. He didn't seem to notice I had returned at first but gave a small glance in my direction to show he did acknowledge me after all. I took my seat and tried to wipe my mind from the contents in the box I held in my lap.

-

The day passed rather quickly I suppose. When you're distracting yourself I do think it is meant to be faster. Ryan stayed quiet as I clung to the box in my lap in the truck on the way back home. He didn't want to bring up what he saw. I know he felt pressured and I had to let him know it wasn't meant for him to be. Right now, though, I didn't want to mention it. Not in the car, at least. The ride seemed tense for some reason and I knew it wasn't coming from me now. I glanced at Ryan and rested my hand on his thigh. When he slightly clenched the wheel I took my hand away and tucked it into my other one. Something heavier was on his mind or this really bothered him. Maybe both... The truck pulled up to the house and still without a word Ryan and I exit the vehicle. I grab my bag and box while following Ryan to the door. He fiddles with the keys for a moment before finding the one to the house and sliding it into the lock. As soon as the door shuts behind me, I turn to Ryan and set the box on the side table next to the front door.

"Talk to me." I tell him softly. He turns to face me as well and sighs. "Is it what was in the box? Because I understand that you'd be freaked out." He doesn't say anything but does give a nod of his head. "Ryan, I'm not gonna force you into something you don't want to do. You know that right?"

"Yes, I know."

"Then why do you make it seem like it was me telling you to marry me?"

"Because I'm scared." He admits. "I'm scared of you and I building something up only for it to shatter like the last time I married someone." I stayed quiet and let him continue. "I love you. I know that much. And I know you're probably scared, too, given your past. I just don't want to ruin this. It's good, great even. I just want us to both be sure that this isn't gonna just crash and burn." I walk to him and wrap my arms around him, resting my head into his chest.

"You're right." I whisper. "I am scared. I'm scared for other reasons than it crashing and burning suddenly. I'm scared of what it will do to me. Will I get commitment issues? Will I hate myself? Will I always see myself as unmarryable?" I pull back and rest my arms around his waist loosely. "And I know those are questions you asked yourself after Laurie. Because I asked those after Adam and we weren't even married. I love you and I trust you. I think that for now, that should be enough for us. Because ruining this isn't something I want in the picture I have for us." Ryan smiles down at me before placing a kiss on my forehead.


	22. Twenty-Two

Ryan was currently in the other room, cooling off as I was in another room myself, doing the same. After a long day at work and nothing but messes, both of us were annoyed. Meaning even the slightest problem can set us both off. It's rare for something like this to happen, but it's not impossible. Our argument felt big at the moment, but little in reality. He didn't want to go out on a date tonight and I did just to relax with him and me only. It was stupid just like I said but with all the anger I had built up today I couldn't help feeling hurt that he didn't want to relax with me and instead by himself. I tried to make that point clear to him even though neither of us are up for listening to each other. I heard the door to the room he was in and quickly ran for the bathroom, knowing that's where he was most likely headed. When I saw him going right for the door I darted in and slammed it shut, locking it.

"Come on, Sam." Ryan says stiffly through the door. "Are you really gonna be this petty?" I don't reply. He groans loudly and I can almost hear him put his hands up in the air. "Fine. Be that way. I'm gonna just go to Jack's." I feel my face go tight in a frown and angered brows. I yank open the restroom and glare at Ryan's back as he walks towards the front door.

"Are you serious?" I shout. "You've been with them all day and you won't even go with me somewhere to relax with each other?" He spins to look at me.

"Why do we have to go out to relax?" He shouts right back. "Why can't we just stay here and be with each other like we always are?"

"Because we just sit here and watch T.V. and then go to bed!" I argue, frustration bringing tears to my eyes.

"Is that really so bad?"

"Yes!"

"How?"

"Because I feel like you're getting tired of me and that's all we're ever gonna do!" He stares at me as tears begin falling in anger and now in a sort of fear/sadness. "I just get scared that maybe since we keep rushing things our relationship won't be building up to those boring parts that are supposed to be comfortable. I want us to have fun and love being with each other no matter how long it lasts." I begin to hold myself, angry that I chose today of all days to discuss this with him. We were both already fired up so I was just making it worse. Ryan sighs and comes over to me, placing his jacket on the back of the dining room chair again.

"Sam..." He lifts my head and runs a hand over my hair to fix it. "I'm not getting tired of you. I don't think I ever will; Every day with you is a surprise." I look up to him, slightly shaking. "I like doing the things we do here because it's nice to just- be with you. You as you are: comfortable and content. I mean, if I'm reading the signs wrong I'm sorry. I thought you felt the same way." His voice was so gentle as if he was afraid I'd break. I sigh with an uneasy breath and nod.

"I feel the same, it's just... Today." He chuckles lowly and wraps me to his chest.

"I know..." His lips hit my forehead with a light kiss. "I love you, beautiful."

"I love you, too..." I cling tightly to him and let out a long and deep breath. "I'm sorry. Let's stay inside tonight and just watch a movie or something." He smiles and nods while pulling away from me.

"Don't worry about dinner." He says. "I'll order Chinese." I smile and nod while walking over to the couch to prepare a movie.

-

It's been a week since Ryan and I discussed our date choices and argued over stupid things. Tonight, Ryan had surprised me with plans that were out of the house this time.

"So what are you gonna wear?" I turn and look to Barbara, who had her feet kicked up on my desk while eating a Ben and Jerry's.

"It's just a regular date, Barb. Probably just a simple outfit." I point out with a shrug. I type out my email on my computer while she tosses her empty container at the can by Chris' desk. She misses and sighs, turning back to me.

"I don't know... Ryan suddenly surprises you with plans? He might be wanting you to feel like you're on your first date again." I thought for a moment and realized she had a point.

"You're right..." I mutter. "I guess I'll get dressed like it's a fresh date again!" Now I was legitimately excited for the date. I bit my lip and stood from my desk, tossing Barb's missed trash in the actual can. "So what should I wear? A little dress and some make-up?"

"High-heels, too." I arch an eyebrow at her suggestion. "What? It's gonna look cute together, trust me." I groaned and shrugged.

"Alright, fine." I walk back to my desk and take my seat. "I'll wear the stupid heels... But where are we even going? He's not telling me anything about it."

"I think he mentioned lights to Jack and Jeremy." She says with a small hint.

"Like city lights or what?"

"I don't know, girl, lights!" I laugh and look to her.

"Thank you for the hint." She winks at me and stands from the chair across from me.

"Just let me know how it goes, kay?" I nod and she exits the office.

-

I tugged at my little black dress to make sure it was still the correct length it was meant to be at. My heels were comfortable for now and my make-up was light so I was able to breathe through my skin. Ryan was waiting in the living room while I double checked everything nervously. It was exactly like a first date all over again for me; Barb was right. I let out a focused deep breath before nodding and exiting the room. I clacked in the hallway until I got to the carpeted living room. Ryan had his back turned to me with a white dress shirt on and a dress suit jacket slung over his shoulder. He looked sharp and clean. He turns to me and smiles before it fades and he stares at me.

"You look gorgeous." He breathes out. I laugh lightly and tuck my hair behind my ear.

"Thank you, Ryan." I whisper. "You look handsome as hell." He chuckles and shrugs.

"Thought if you looked good so should I." I walked to him and instead of leaning up I kissed him straight because of my heels. "This is weird- you can actually reach me."

"I know right?" We share a smile and he grabs his keys from the counter. I nod and follow him out of the house. I slide into the truck and wait patiently for Ryan as he does the same. "So Barbara told me she heard you mention lights and that's it about tonight." I confess.

"I know." He says casually. "I told her to tell you just that."

"Ryan!"

"What?" He laughs out. "I wanted tonight to be a surprise still." I sigh and throw my head back.

"You're lucky I love you."

"And if you didn't?"

"Then you're just lucky." We pull up to a diner that we haven't visited before. I step out of the truck and follow him hand in hand to the building. It wasn't crowded thankfully and we got a booth by the window. After about and hour and a half, we were ready to leave, Ryan dropping a ten on the table. "Someone's generous tonight." I joke. He shrugs and shoves his wallet back into his pocket.

"She deserved it." I nod and we exit after paying the bill. "Come on, I wanted to walk from here." I looked to my feet and he shakes his head. "It won't hurt you, I swear." I eye him but follow him away from the truck anyways. I could see different lights trailing the areas of Austin, but mainly Christmas lights.

"So these are the mystery lights?" He nods and I shrug. "Honestly, still beautiful." He smiles wide and halfway over the bridge we crossed, he stops and looks around.

"Let's go somewhere." I smiled and nodded, following him. He walked with me towards the more hilled areas and stopped me at the bottom of one. He kneels down and removes each heel from my feet before lifting me bridal style and causing a squeak of surprise from me. I laughed loudly as he carried me up to hill, smiling as he made "superhero noises" all the way up. When we make it to the top and he sets me down, I calm my laughter.

"You're a fucking dork." I say with a giant smile on my face. He rolls his eyes and I look out over the city from underneath the willow tree he trudged me up to. "It's beautiful from here. It's like you can see half of Austin from here." I turned to Ryan and I froze when I saw the willow tree that was once darkened was now bright with a spiral of lights on the tree trunk.

"They are on battery, so we don't have a lot of time since I spent half the battery life testing them." He explains. I walk forwards and lean down, placing my shoes on the ground while admiring the scene.

"Ryan..." I was actually speechless. There was a big sigh from him as he stepped forwards and looked me dead in the eye.

"I wanted tonight to be special. So far, is it?" I nod quickly with no hesitation in mind. "Good. Because I have one more surprise." My hand flings to my mouth as he holds my other one and his free hand goes to his pocket. He pulls out a beautiful but simple opal ring. He doesn't kneel like the traditional proposer would. I didn't care at all, seeing this as his own way of doing this. "I love you so much and I want you to be mine forever thanks to the special night we had tonight. Can you do me the honor of making that happen?" I dive on him, nodding into his neck as I cried softly in excitement. I feel him loosen up and wrap me tightly in a hug that I could feel every emotion in. I pulled back from him with tears streaking my face with a grin plastered on it as well. He holds up the ring to me and I stare at its beauty in the tree's lights when he slips it onto my ring finger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end. Thank you for reading ♡


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